Mindful Monday: Promise Yourself

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martinafurlong

Promise yourself

To be so strong
that nothing can disturb your peace of mind.

(But remember that a worried mind is not necessarily a sign of weakness. It’s a sign of being HUMAN.)

To talk health, happiness, and prosperity
to every person you meet.

(But never be afraid to share your struggles with people you trust. Pushing your deepest, darkest fears and insecurities into the pit of your stomach is isolation at its worst. We are all here to love and accept each other.)

To make all your friends feel
that there is something worthwhile in them.

(Because there absolutely is.)

To look at the sunny side of everything
and make your optimism come true.

(But know that it’s human to feel scared/defeated/lonely sometimes.)

To think only the best, to work only for the best,
and to expect only the best.

(Did you try your best? Or close to your best? You deserve a round of applause. Be proud of your efforts.)

To be just as enthusiastic about the success of others
as you are about your own.

(Absolutely. Isn’t it amazing what people can do?!)

To forget the mistakes of the past
and press on to the greater achievements of the future.

(Maybe not forget, but FORGIVE. I forgive myself on a daily basis. On some days, hourly.)

To wear a cheerful countenance at all times
and give every living creature you meet a smile.

(You’re never fully dressed without a smile. But if your heart feels like it’s breaking wide open, it’s okay to be sad too. It’s also more than okay to talk to someone about it.)

To give so much time to the improvement of yourself
that you have no time to criticize others.

(I’m going to let you in on a little secret. You are perfect just the way you are, so keep your chin up.)

To be too large for worry, too noble for anger, too strong for fear,
and too happy to permit the presence of trouble.

(But we all have our “off” days. It’s okay. Dust yourself off. Tomorrow’s a brand new day.)

To think well of yourself and to proclaim this fact to the world,
not in loud words but great deeds.

(The world hungers for great deeds.)

To live in faith that the whole world is on your side
so long as you are true to the best that is in you.

(FIST BUMP, MR. LARSON.)

-Christian D. Larson, Your Forces and How to Use Them

(With my thoughts in parentheses…)

image credit: martina furlong



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Odds and Ends

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kateholstein

1. I know I just left California, but I think my first vacation needs to be Big Sur. Maybe a little visit to here.

2. “I’ve heard it said that every day you need half an hour of quiet time for yourself, or your Self, unless you’re incredibly busy and stressed, in which case you need an hour. I promise you, it is there. Fight tooth and nail to find time, to make it. It is our true wealth, this moment, this hour, this day.” Preach, Anne Lamott.

3. A 7-day smartphone detox. Could you do it?

4. This is such a great idea. Friday night dinners FTW.

5. Mamas of the kindergarten crew, can you relate?

6. HAHAAA, BENTO BOX DOMINATION.

7. Yep, you’ve been doing wrong. Bring on the fat!

8. Confession, I had to google “Tinder.” Pretty funny.

9. Nice, Louboutin. “Nude” comes in all different shades.

10. Adam Levine KILLED these impressions. I’ve watched 11,000 times.

11. Fascinating look at ballerinas prepping their pointe shoes.

12. Tears running down my face – this is pure comedic GOLD. Tell me you haven’t read comments like these on recipe blogs.

13. Pssst – you’ve been cuffing your shirtsleeves ALL WRONG.

14. What’s the craziest way a Starbucks barista has spelled your name? Mind game!

photo credit: Kate Holstein



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What’s Your Favorite Tinted Moisturizer or BB/CC Cream?

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Well, it’s just about time for a new cosmetic hunt, my friends. This time around? Tinted moisturizer or BB Cream or CC Cream or basically anything that will make my face look less, well, the way it looks right now. Is that too much to ask?

So, I did what I always do. Asked the smartest people in the world on my Facebook page. And the replies were abundant – feel free to read the 70+ recommendations yourself. Or! Take a look at this colorful masterpiece that I created just for you.

favebb

PIE CHART. Is that some old school Whoorl or what? (You guys need to click on that link, if not just to be reminded of that awful haircut I got way back when. Remember The Barracuda? HOT.) So, yeah, pie chart. I’m still highly scientific. (Except the percentages part, which I left out, because I…I just don’t know how to make that happen.)

In a nutshell, 41 different tinted moisturizers, lightweight foundations, and BB/CC creams were recommended, and I pie-charted the top 8 for you.

Here are the winners:

NARS Pure Radiant Tinted Moisturizer - The overall winner. And you know I love my NARS…

Bobbi Brown Tinted Moisturizer - A solid second, good ol’ Bobbi has lots of fans.

Laura Mercier Tinted Moisturizer – Coming in 3rd, this suggestion by many made me laugh because I specifically said that this product did not work for me, yet people felt inclined to mention it again and again. (I do not like it at all. I wish I did, but I don’t.)

Tarte BB Tinted Treatment – This was in a three-way tie for 3rd place, and I am very interested because it scores a 2 (!!) on the EWG Skin Deep website that I’ve loved for years and years. (I don’t always follow it, but love it.)

Chanel Vitalumiere Foundation and others - Besides the Vitalumiere, I’m not sure what other Chanel products were mentioned, but people like ‘em.

The next 3 tied for 4th place.

Beautycounter Tint Skin Complexion Coverage – Another must-try product for me because of its low EWG score. This company’s mission is to get safe products into the hands of everyone.

Dr. Jart+ Premium Beauty Balm – Who is Dr. Jart? Do I need to try this stuff?

Clinique Moisture Surge Tinted Moisturizer - You know how much I adore my beloved Airbrush Concealer…maybe the tinted moisturizer could fit the bill.

There you have it, folks. Have at ‘em. As for me? Here’s the deal. I’ve spent an exorbitant amount of time cleaning up my lifestyle over the past few years, and it always surprises me that I eat a clean, gluten-free diet with very minimal sugar and barely any processed goods, I clean my house with nothing but organic cleaners, and spend mega time reading labels for my kids’, yet STILL put stuff on my body and face that is known to harbor crazy chemicals. What the WHAT.

So! I’m going the healthy route, and am hot after 4 products right now – Beautycounter Tint Skin, Tarte BB Tinted Treatment, Clinique Moisture Surge CC Cream, and Supergoop Daily Correct CC Cream. All 4 of these products score a 3 or lower on the EWG website, and I’m confident I can find one that I will love.

(Although, seriously, I bet any of those top 8 would be fantastic if you aren’t as concerned with cosmetic ingredients. Love me some NARS!)

Now it’s your turn. Help out your fellow makeup-loving ladies - what is your favorite tinted moisturizer or BB/CC cream?



COMMENTS (20)

Mindful Monday: Self-Talk

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mm5

This week’s Mindful Monday post is written by Natalie Bodenhamer of HelloDayBlog. I had the pleasure of meeting Natalie earlier this year (in a Trader Joe’s parking lot, of all places), and was really drawn to her energy and spirit. I love Natalie’s take on self-talk – it’s a BIG challenge for me, and I found myself wanting to fist-bump her while reading this post. Thanks, Natalie!

We all talk to ourselves – it’s not just for the crazies. Whether it’s a pep talk before an interview or humorous chitchat while in line at the grocery store, we constantly find ourselves engaged in self-talk.

One of my favorite self-talkers of all time is Bob Wiley (Bill Murray) in the movie, What About Bob.

Baby steps, get on the elevator. Baby steps, get on the bus. I feel good, I feel great, I feel wonderful! Is this corn hand-shucked? I’m sailing!

The lovable schizophrenic talks himself all the way to the mast of a sailboat, for goodness sakes. It gets me every time.

Self-talk is powerful. Yet, our thoughts fall on a spectrum – from honoring to destructive. The voice we hear can be a source of motivation and strength or, on our worse days, drive us to hopelessness and despair. While I would love to hear, “go get ‘em, girl”, sometimes I get, “never gonna happen, sister”. It’s not always positive. At times it sounds down right hopeless and mean.

If we simply listen to ourselves, we miss an incredible opportunity to shape our internal talk. With focus and care, we have the power to influence our internal voice.

• Pay attention. In the midst of wrangling kids, juggling a career and trying to be a good friend, it’s not easy to pay attention to our thoughts. Set your focus and be mindful of your own thoughts. Is there a common tone? When you listen, do you feel optimistic and empowered? Only after listening carefully can you really engage in a meaningful internal conversation.

• Be in a community. Assessing your own thoughts can be confusing as hell. The more tricky or dark the messages, the more valuable it becomes to address them aloud with close and trusted friends/family. It’s amazing what one conversation with a loved one can do to provide prospective and help reframe your thoughts. Before jumping right into such a conversation, I say something like, “I would like your input as I work through x.” Or, “Would you mind talking a few ideas through with me?” And if a certain thought seems alarming to share, I remind the special friend/husband that it isn’t a truth I believe, but rather a feeling I want to evaluate more closely with their help.

• Don’t be afraid to call Bullshit. Some of the messages we send ourselves simply aren’t true. Some are destructive. It’s important to listen, assess and either validate or call bullshit.

• Most negative thoughts are rooted in comparison. When confronted with negative messages, start by asking – “Is this thought related to my own or someone else’s comparison of me to someone/something?” If the answer is “yes”, then, “bullshit” is your response. Capisce?

• Put it in writing. If there’s something that I need to hear regularly, I write it down and stick it in plain view. My bathroom mirror & kitchen backsplash are popular spots for me. I encourage you to be bold in this – during a particularly tough time for me I had the words, “remember, you like a challenge” on my bathroom mirror. At first I worried what our babysitter would think if she saw it, so I hesitated. But, quickly realized using the card as a bookmark on my bed stand was getting me nowhere. So, on the mirror it went.

• Get moving. Moving the body triggers movement in the mind as well. When I exercise or go for a walk or run, something special happens. I’m more aware of my thoughts, feelings and sensations. It’s a great time to make progress with troublesome thoughts. And if the vibe is right, I will even have the conversation aloud. You know, just to mix it up.

• Be kind to yourself. I’m not talking about empty, positive, kumbaya bologna. No, be honest and without spin. But, do yourself a favor and choose a glass-half-full perspective. And, every bullshit thought encountered must be met with a response rooted in reality, hope and love.

Being known in a community of friends and family is the most important component for me to maintain a positive internal conversation. Those relationships are a source of truth, love and support and remind me of my value and purpose. There’s no book I could read or podcast I could listen to that would replace the value of hearing a dear friend say how much they love me.

So, if I notice my internal conversation taking a negative turn, my first step is to spend time with a friend. Because, they remind me of the hope, joy and excitement I have for this adventure called life.

How do you proactively influence your internal conversations?



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