It frightens me that I’m finding it easier to express my feelings in haiku form than in basic sentences, but I feel the need to go with it. I’m glad to know that I will retain 4 readers.
Thus, I give you Whoorl’s Week in Haiku.
Man, there is a lot
of stink ass perfume out there
Nostril damage, yo
The end of the world
in 2012, no need
to tell me that, Mark
It is possible
to have blunt and sideswept bangs
concomitantly
“Concomitantly”
is the most overused word
by pharma sales reps
Who cares if Twilight
is old news next Halloween
I will be Bella
D will be perfect
as Edward, with his vampire
Blue Steel model stare
My child did not poop
for eleven frickin’ days
Now it is shit city
The most perfect home
was this close to being ours
Up yours, New York man
However, he still
might be our landlord so I
better shut my mouth
When I get nervous
I chew my bottom lip, it
looks like shredded wheat
Wito needs to quit
with the guttural groaning
or it’s bitch slap time
I can’t believe it
but it actually feels
like fall in So Cal
I need to film a
hairstyle tutorial but
my voice kills kittens
Yes, I know I look
like Kristin Davis, yes I
hear it all day long
“People You May Know”
is the most horrifying
app found on Facebook
It’s like a collage
of ex-boyfriends and blind dates
No thank you, AWKWARD
I just wrote sixteen
haikus, now it is your turn
Hit me with your best