It frightens me that I’m finding it easier to express my feelings in haiku form than in basic sentences, but I feel the need to go with it. I’m glad to know that I will retain 4 readers.
Thus, I give you Whoorl’s Week in Haiku.
Man, there is a lot
of stink ass perfume out there
Nostril damage, yo
The end of the world
in 2012, no need
to tell me that, Mark
It is possible
to have blunt and sideswept bangs
concomitantly
“Concomitantly”
is the most overused word
by pharma sales reps
Who cares if Twilight
is old news next Halloween
I will be Bella
D will be perfect
as Edward, with his vampire
Blue Steel model stare
My child did not poop
for eleven frickin’ days
Now it is shit city
The most perfect home
was this close to being ours
Up yours, New York man
However, he still
might be our landlord so I
better shut my mouth
When I get nervous
I chew my bottom lip, it
looks like shredded wheat
Wito needs to quit
with the guttural groaning
or it’s bitch slap time
I can’t believe it
but it actually feels
like fall in So Cal
I need to film a
hairstyle tutorial but
my voice kills kittens
Yes, I know I look
like Kristin Davis, yes I
hear it all day long
“People You May Know”
is the most horrifying
app found on Facebook
It’s like a collage
of ex-boyfriends and blind dates
No thank you, AWKWARD
I just wrote sixteen
haikus, now it is your turn
Hit me with your best
slynnro
December 5, 2008 at 11:12 amOh Wah WAH WAH WAH
I look like Kristin Davis
Life is so so hard
I bet you are so excited to see me now, huh? Since I’m so sweet!
slynnro
December 5, 2008 at 11:13 amoooh, and Bearca’s rocks.
Dana
December 5, 2008 at 11:35 amYou are so funny
wish I had your luscious hair
(I am not a stalker)
Angella
December 5, 2008 at 11:37 amI suck at haiku
But yours are so funny, I
had to at least try
Tricia
December 5, 2008 at 11:51 amI liked your story
of eleven days no poop
made me laugh a lot
Black Hockey Jesus
December 5, 2008 at 11:53 amThis is a comment
and a haiku too! Left by
Black Hockey Jesus
rachel
December 5, 2008 at 12:05 pmI love your Haikus- here’s my haiku for the week:
my kids are still sick
my house is a disaster
I need a long nap
ellbee
December 5, 2008 at 1:37 pmI’m so glad you’re bringing back the haikus! I actually composed this one about a coworker a while ago…he frankly will not SHUT UP on any conference call, ever.
wind through a cavern
your mouth is a brook always
babbling, shut up.
And then about my day thus far:
as solid as wood
my head pounds a beat on the
top of my desk, ow.
happy weekend, everyone!
Jaclyn
December 5, 2008 at 5:30 pmDamn you holidays
With your nonstop snacks and drinks
Now have bra strap fat.
~moe~
December 5, 2008 at 8:04 pmHow I love your blog.
It makes me very happy
So happy I cry
But I’m probably
just really tired from work
so to bed I go
Jeanmarie
December 5, 2008 at 10:26 pmWe have THE LICE!!
BUGS! I cut her hair myself…
Now it’s bi-level:-(
Lindsey
December 6, 2008 at 7:36 pmI can’t write poetry to save my life (though God knows I tried in high school, all melancholy) but the one with the bitch slap for all the guttural groaning? I nanny for three kids, and the 1 year old twins do that all. the. time. So that haiku cracked me up.
Momo Fali
December 7, 2008 at 4:57 pmWork, laundry, cleaning
Not enough hours in a day
This week kicked my ass
Ninabi
December 7, 2008 at 7:40 pmYour Spanish green beans
were a hit on Thanksgiving
my guests were most pleased.
Love your style and your humor.
Kerri Anne
December 7, 2008 at 8:24 pmHoliday party:
where drunk bosses kiss your cheeks.
Not those ones. Sicko.
A fan of advance
Halloween costume planning,
I’m going as junk mail.