Yes, I am writing a post about a vacuum cleaner.

What? You mean you don’t vacuum your house in a dress and heels? DOMESTIC GODDESS STATUS REVOKED!

Let’s talk about the newest love of my life. Yes, it’s a vacuum cleaner, and although some of you might think that a little awkward, if you’ve been around here for awhile, you know I love me some clean floors. I am a Vacuuming Expert, a Sweeping Expert… basically, if you need to someone to come over and rid you of all the dust bunnies on your floor, I’m your girl.

Remember how excruciating it was for me to leave those Cheerios on my kitchen floor for this experiment? I shudder at the thought.

Here’s the deal. I’m not going to name names, but D and I plunked down a LOT of cash for a very popular vacuum cleaner a few years ago, and although that very popular vacuum cleaner was very loved during the first few months, it quickly became the bane of our existence. It was horrible. It wouldn’t suck up 50% of what was on the floor, and we were totally baffled. I can’t tell you how many times we would look at each other and say, “maybe we’re doing it wrong.” Doing it wrong? It’s a VACUUM CLEANER, not a highly scientific projectile rocket launcher. Yet we would try and try and then visit the the manufacturer-approved repair facility who would replace a random part, only to see no significant improvement when we returned home. Let me be completely frank, our housekeeper wouldn’t even use it. She instead lugged a 50-pound monster from 1979 around the house instead of utilizing the Fancy New Vacuum.

The vacuum was highly annoying, to say the least. Especially to a lady who quite enjoys vacuuming her floors. So when Oreck contacted me about sending me the new Oreck Magnesium Vacuum Combo, I kind of flipped out like a freak of nature. YES, ORECK. PLEASE SEND ME THE VACUUM. P.S. – I LOVE YOU.

You guys. YOU GUYS. I’m trying so hard not to be all cringeworthy vacuum cleaner fan girl, but I love it so much. It sucks up everything. Everything! You can use it on all types of floors and rugs! It lies virtually flat, so you can vacuum allllllll the way underneath chairs and other furniture! AND! It weighs 7 pounds. I am totally serious when I tell you than I can hold the vacuum cleaner above my head with one hand.

Now, of course, it retails for $600, so it better be a damn good vacuum cleaner, right? It is worth every penny though, and I would gladly spend my cash on this bad boy. (Immediately followed by setting the former Fancy Vacuum Cleaner aflame while performing some Wiccan dance routines in my driveway.) Don’t forget that the combo includes the Ultimate Handheld Vac, a powerful, portable and lightweight handheld vacuum. If your current handheld vacuum is a little lackluster (let’s say it sucks up Cheerios, but the second you turn it off, the Cheerios fall right out of the nozzle onto the floor…you know what I’m talking about…), you will love this awesome little vac.

Drumroll, please. Oreck is giving away one Magnesium Vacuum Combo to a lucky Whoorl reader. Awesomeness. There are a few ways to enter.

1. The first (and mandatory) entry is to head over to Oreck, check out the vacuum, and leave a comment on this post about one thing you learned about the Magnesium.

If you’d like some extra chances to win, here are some more options. Please leave me a separate comment for each that you do so you get full opportunities to win!

2. Follow @oreck on Twitter.

3. Like Oreck on Facebook.

4. Sign up for Oreck’s email list by clicking on the orange “Sign up for Email” in the top navigation bar on the right at Oreck’s website.

The giveaway winner must be a resident of the 48 contiguous states. Sorry, Hawaii and Alaska. You know I love you guys, though.

Entries will be accepted until next Tuesday, May 29th at 6 p.m. PST. I’ll announce the winner the following day. Good luck, everyone!

Oreck kindly provided me with the Magnesium Vacuum Combo. Oreck Corporation provided the prize for the sweepstakes but is not the sponsor of the sweepstakes.