I’ve wanted to post a video of Wito playing with his very favorite toy, the nasal aspirator. Over the past 9 months, we’ve spent approximately 1.9 million dollars on ball-popping, squeaky-singing, colorful toys and all he cares about is licking and chewing the snot sucker. It’s simultaneously endearing and fully disgusting.

However, I’m holding out for two reasons. First of all, he is not wearing any pants AGAIN in the video and frankly, there have to be some people wondering if I ever dress my child from the waist down. And the answer is, no. Not really. Secondly, the whole aspirator-thingy looks remotely phallic and I can’t bring myself to publish the video knowing there are some sicko turdbags out there that would possibly derive pleasure from watching such a thing. What can I say? I watch Dateline.

Back to the pants situation. I do put pants on my child when we make our public appearances, but the minute we return home, the pants are whisked off in a manner of seconds. Have you seen my child’s thighs? Witnessed his Dunlap’s Disease? The kid needs room to breathe. He is barely 9 months old and wearing clothing made for 2 year olds. It physically hurts me to see his belly exploding over the top of his pants when he’s stuck sitting in the car seat or stroller. My only other option would be to buy pants made for three year olds, but I’m pretty sure that would require hemming. Lots of hemming. See figure one.


However, please direct your attention to Wito: Yoga Master.


  1. Rachel

    May 17, 2007 at 4:42 am

    Wow, Wito must be cleaning up on the Baby Sumo circuit! SO CUTE! Jillian has much the same problem. She’s only almost 10 months but rocking the 18 month or bigger pants because she has a jellybelly and long long legs.

    And yes, despite the hundred of dollars worth of toys surrounding her as we speak, she is chewing on a gift bag from Hallmark. She also enjoys chewing on my wallet, my cell phone, my keys, the diaper wipes container, paper towels, my feet, and pretty much anything that is not an actual baby toy. Babies are strange, strange people.

  2. Alissa

    May 17, 2007 at 4:51 am

    You should try Baby Legs (comfort cuff for your little bub)(http://www.babylegs.net/). They are sooo cute and we love them.

  3. Sue

    May 17, 2007 at 8:22 am

    How Cutee!!!! luv him…

  4. amy

    May 17, 2007 at 10:30 am

    he is a hefty little sucka…and i want to eat those legs. they are yummy.