Terrible Twos

Wito’s 2nd birthday party is this Saturday, and I’m knee-deep in preparation. (You know, if “knee-deep” means watching Paula Deen and her sons make a mighty fine Banana Split Cake while filing my nails.)

Oh, and those Terrible Twos? They have officially made their appearance one week early.

Case in point #1:


What do you MEAN the carousel isn’t open yet? MY LIFE IS A HEAPING PILE OF DOG SHIT.

Case in point #2:


I’m not really fond of this drab wall color. Let me spruce it up a bit.

Send help.

  1. Camille

    July 30, 2008 at 11:24 pm

    I wish all I had to do to spruce up my drab house was bust out the Crayolas™! That’s way cheaper than all my trips to the Home Depot™.

  2. Sheryl

    July 31, 2008 at 5:34 am

    Wito needs a one year blog, and MY LIFE IS A HEAPING PILE OF DOG SHIT needs to be the tag line.

  3. Amanda

    July 31, 2008 at 5:49 am

    Oh dude. Can I just say how impressed I am that you stopped to take pictures of the tantrum and the wall coloring as they were happening? Rather than scrambling to contain the chaos? Because you usually don’t come by that kind of composure (well, actually, it’s the “oh fck it, where is my camera?” attitude) until you become a mom of two kiddos. Nice.

    And also? PLEASE PLEAAASE BLOG YOUR BIRTHDAY PREPARATIONS! PUHLEAAASE. Because my dude is turning two NEXT weekend and holy shit…. I got nuthin.

  4. Katia / Crazy For Trying

    July 31, 2008 at 6:32 am

    I can only help by saying that the tantrums will end. My daughter started her terrible twos @ 15mo. and that lasted until 1 week before her 3rd birthday, when the tantrums miraculously and practically overnight vanished.
    Now that my 2nd child is past the 1 year mark I’m digging in my heels for round two of the tantrums.

  5. Sabrina

    July 31, 2008 at 7:00 am

    You mean it gets worse? Oh god.

  6. Laurie

    July 31, 2008 at 7:32 am

    Oh! I’ve been through it once and I am not looking forward to it with child # 2, luckily I have a bit of time left.

    And Hey! I didn’t realize my R and Wito share birthdays. Lucky us! :)

  7. LVGurl

    July 31, 2008 at 8:01 am

    TerribleTwos is a big lie. It starts at 18 months, and keeps going until, oh I don’t know… the four-year-old is still a it ;)

  8. rebecca

    July 31, 2008 at 8:24 am

    Uh, yeah… two can be a nightmare. However, I’m finding that THREE might be even worse because they are more articulate and no less angry! I get things like “You are such a MEAN MOMMY!” and “Don’t be rude to me!” which then dissolve into a screaming tantrum if I forget to let him turn the water on for his bath. Sheesh.

  9. martymankins

    July 31, 2008 at 9:54 am

    Up until my step daughter had a child, it had been years since I had to deal with a 2 yr old. I was 30 with my daughter. Being 42 and dealing with it again was a bit of a challenge.

    It does get better, though.

  10. Jennifer

    July 31, 2008 at 10:48 am

    I didn’t read the ALL THESE comments (sorry, hello I have a life, ahem) and I’m sure this was already said, but I keep hearing three is WORSE. I’m not sure if that’s supposed to make you feel better or worse.

    By the way my son is a smidge shy of three and holy terror, Batman!

    Good luck.

  11. Allison

    July 31, 2008 at 12:18 pm

    4 Words: Mr. Clean Magic Eraser. Removes EVERYTHING from EVERYWHERE (Including crayon from walls. If I could make out with it, I would.)

  12. Mrs. Schmitty

    July 31, 2008 at 12:48 pm

    You gotta buy the kid an aquadoodle. When they start coloring on walls, it’s time they start coloring with water!

  13. Bumbling

    July 31, 2008 at 1:38 pm

    Ah welcome, welcome. Step this way….On your right you will see the “Hall of Endless Opposites”: “Noooo Mami – I dont want that” (2 seconds later) “WAHHHHHH I WANT THAT”.
    To your right – “The Art Gallery”- WHO GRAFFITIED ON THE BABY?

    My recommendations:
    1) Lots of wine for you and your husband
    2) Washable crayons/markers and many Aquadoodles.
    3) DON”T BUY PLAYDOH. Just don’t.

  14. amy

    July 31, 2008 at 2:31 pm

    looks like you need some of that mr.clean eraser!

    he is too cute though.

  15. Amanda Brown

    July 31, 2008 at 2:54 pm

    We are living parallel lives. Really. Avelyn hurls her angry body on the pavement at least three times a day, and she recently took a ballpoint pen to our beige sofa. A raging Picasso in the making.
    It’s so nice to know I’m not alone in these dealings, but seriously, what’s with our kids?! Good thing they’re cute.