Leaving Las Vegas

Hey, how was your weekend? Mine was interesting to say the least…

Whoorl’s Shitty Weekend in List Form:

1. I woke up Friday morning in Las Vegas sooooo ready to fly home at 3:53pm. It’s going to be a great extended weekend!
2. Got ready for my morning meetings when I noticed something strange going on. Remembered that this strange event can be common in early pregnancy, and tried not to stress about it.
3. Attended meetings from 7:45 – 11:30. Had absolutely no idea what in the hell was going on because all I could think about was my baby.
4. Confided in two of my colleagues who both suggested I call my doctor immediately.
5. Called my doctor, explained the situation, and told her about my flight home in less than 4 hours. I was hoping she would tell me to get my ass home pronto. Unfortunately, that was not the case as she told me to go to the nearest ER immediately.
6. Hung up the phone. Slight whoorl meltdown while hiding behind a partition in the Venetian hotel. There were about 400 reps from my company in the area with me and all I wanted to do was find my manager, tell him the situation and get the hell out of dodge without them all seeing me cry. I just REALLY didn’t want to make a scene- which was difficult considering I was a extremely hormonal, scared pregnant lady who had just been told to go to the ER in Las Vegas.
7. Somehow managed to get my manager’s attention, told him the situation, and we took off together in search for a cab.
8. Found the cab line at the front of the Venetian, cut in front of 250 reps while my boss yelled “NEAREST HOSPITAL PLEASE!” So much for not making a scene.
9. We were dropped off at the Sunrise Hospital Emergency Room, aka Shit-My-Pants-Kind-Of-Scary Hospital. The ER was packed, which I expected considering Las Vegas is notorious for extremely long ER waits.
10. The triage nurse checked me in with comments like “Well, you know if you miscarry, there’s nothing you can do about it”. “The baby can’t survive on it’s own.” “I’ve had 5 miscarriages myself and it’s really common and NO BIG DEAL.” I swear I nearly punched her few remaining teeth out. NO SHIT, BITCH! I’M FULLY AWARE OF MY SITUATION, THANKS. I’M SORRY I’M KEEPING YOU FROM YOUR NASCAR EVENT.
11. Called D to inform him that I had made it to the ER. At this point , we decided it would be best for him to make the 4 1/2 hour drive to come get me since it was about 1:00pm and we weren’t sure about making my flight home.
12. For the next three hours, my boss (who, frankly, missed his own flight for me and was AMAZING the entire day) tried to pass the time by making fun of the complete fashion disasters that were surrounding us and closing in fast. People, there were some denim items that I have never seen the likes of in my 31 years on this planet.
13. Yes, we were making fun of people while waiting to make sure my baby was OK. We are horrible people, but how else do you pass the time?
14. 4:30pm. Not ONE person has been called back in over three hours. My boss checks in with the no-teeth beaatch. She informs him that there are 38 people waiting for beds in the back already. She says it will be at least 5 more hours. When I catch wind of the situation, I make the executive decision to Fuck This, despite my doctor’s advice of being evaluated in Las Vegas.
15. Took a cab back to the Venetian, got my bags, and waited for D to pick me up.
16. Made the 4 1/2 hour drive back home. Drove straight to my hospital’s ER. Arrived around 10:30pm. Only had to wait about an hour, and then spent about three hours being evaluated.
17. Happy news! After blood tests, pelvic exams and an ultrasound, the baby seems just fine. I had a small hemorrhage in my uterus, and was ordered on bed rest until this week when hopefully, the hemorrhage will heal itself. And yes, I totally blame my company’s meeting for all if this considering I had to walk an equivalent of 2-3 miles a day while lugging my books to and from the Convention Center.
18. We drove home from the hospital at 2:30am and crashed (after showers, of course. Germs, people. Germs.)
19. Woke up Saturday morning with some sort of hybrid flu/cold thing and have been in bed ever since while coughing my brains out. And coughing hurts. My head is going to explode and I can’t take anything! Wahhhhhhh.

Good times.

But, hey! Guess what? My baby’s fine! AND I got some really cute ultrasound pics on Friday night/Saturday morning! AND I am getting a follow-up ultrasound in about an hour! So, you know what that means? Whoorlito pics in a couple of hours!

Well, at least that’s exciting to me…


Hostage Crisis


I’m in Las Vegas attending my company’s annual meeting. I really can’t think of anything more fun or titillating than being pregnant in Sin City.

I am counting the minutes until Friday evening when I can sleep in my own bed.

Until then, Viva Las Vegas.


A to Z Meme

Thanks for the idea, Sizzle!

[A is for age:]
31. I am woman, hear me roar.

[B is for booze of choice:]
Dirty vodka martinis, red wine, bloody marys. How can a gal pick just one? But now, it’s all about cranberry juice in a wine glass.

[C is for career:]
I sell drugs. Legally, of course.

[D is for your dog’s name:]
I’ve never had a dog. Weep if you must, but trust me, I’m just peachy without one.

[E is for essential items you use everyday:]
Water. Lip gloss. My Mac. Kiehl’s lip balm. My glasses.

[F is for favorite song(s) at the moment:]
That’s tough. Tenor Man by Greyboy Allstars (I play a mean air drum).

[G is for favorite games:]
Scrabble. Russian Rummy. Solitaire.

[H is for hometown:]
Oklahoma City, Oklahoma. Where the wind comes sweeping down the plain.

[I is for instruments you play:]
I played the clarinet as a child. I also bought a flute on eBay and took lessons a couple years back.

[J is for jam or jelly you like:]
Strawberry jam or jelly.

[K is for kids:]
One on the way!

[L is for last kiss:]
This morning from my husband with morning breath. Yum.

[M is for most admired trait:]
I’m not sure. I try not to make a habit of asking people that question.

N is for name of your crush:]
My husband. (Oh, ok. AND Clive Owen, Patrick Dempsey, Dave Grohl, Beck and James Spader- specifically from Secretary)

[O is for overnight hospital stays:]

[P is for phobias:]
Germs. People coughing in my personal space. Flying without my husband or vice versa. Speaking in front of large groups. ANTS. ANTS. ANTS. They are so scary.

[Q is for quotes you like:]
“People who know little are usually great talkers, while men who know much say little.” – Jean Jacques Rousseau

[R is for biggest regret:]
Not studying abroad in Italy during college.

[S is for sweets of your choice:]
Hello dollies or my mom’s carrot cake.

[T is for time you wake up:]
6:30am, but 7:15am this morning.

[U is for underwear:]
Right now, blue and green striped hipsters.

[V is for vegetables you love:]
I love all vegetables, except for eggplant. I’m severely allergic (like crapping and hurling simultaneously kind of allergic).

[W is for worst habit:]
Leaving my shoes all over the house. D can’t stand it.

[X is for x-rays you’ve had:]
Too many to count.

[Y is for yummy food you make:]
Banana Nut Bread. Taco Soup. Curried Couscous. Bourbon Pecan Pie. Coconut Cream Pie. Neiman Marcus Chocolate Chip Cookies. Lots of stuff!

[Z is for zodiac sign:]
Textbook Scorpio-E-O-E-O.