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Hi there

So I’m not sure how to jump into this post, but here goes. As some of you know, 2013 has been a really challenging year for me. However, in true Whoorl fashion, I always expected to write about my struggles after the fact. You know, the way I like to do it. Solutions to problems! Positive outlooks! Well, it’s taking a lot longer than I expected.

On the bright side, I made it 38 years before dealing with a 1-2-3 punch of insomnia, anxiety and resulting depression. Flip side? Man, things have been bleak around here. I’m certainly not feeling like myself and composing blog posts about concealer is not on my to-do list. In fact, I have no to-do lists. (See? I told you I’m not myself.)

I am so thankful to have a loving, supportive family and healthcare professionals that are my advocates and helping me through these unchartered waters. Although some days feel incredibly hopeless, I know brighter days are in my future. (They have to be, right?)

One of my very favorite quotes by Coach John Wooden seems to be apropos at the moment.

“When you improve a little each day, eventually big things occur…not tomorrow, not the next day, but eventually a big gain is made. Don’t look for the big, quick improvement. Seek the small improvement one day at a time. That’s the only way it happens–and when it happens it lasts.”

Perhaps you are going through something too. If so, please know that you are not alone, and that I am sending love and light your way. Big time.

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67 comments
  1. Emily @ Peck Life

    September 27, 2013 at 12:29 pm

    I am SO with you. You are not alone! 2013 has by far, been my worst year of life for lots of hard reasons…things I never thought I would EVER have happen to me. Sending hugs your way. Everyone is here for you! <3

  2. AlisonC

    September 27, 2013 at 12:30 pm

    Hope you feel more like yourself very soon.

  3. Kristin

    September 27, 2013 at 12:33 pm

    Anxiety is so horrible to live through. I really hope brighter days are ahead for you. Hold on to your children like there is no tomorrow and let their sweetness take the edge off a little. I am sure you will come out on the other end a much stronger & wiser lady. I like the quote. And I believe its true. Hugs. Be kind to yourself.

  4. Roxanna (miguelina)

    September 27, 2013 at 12:34 pm

    Big hugs to you, Friend.

  5. Schmutzie

    September 27, 2013 at 12:36 pm

    I’m intimate with the triple punch of insomnia, depression, and anxiety. I hate that you are now, too, but it’s still so good to see you here again! We like you even without concealer :)

  6. Megan

    September 27, 2013 at 12:37 pm

    Thank you for sharing this today.

    And don’t worry about posts about concealers. We’re all still using Clinique Airbrush, and it’s working just fine. :)

  7. Rebecca B

    September 27, 2013 at 12:40 pm

    A big commiserating sigh coming your way. As someone who has been blindsided by life the past couple of years, I hear you. This stage in life is tough for many of us…the best is yet to come…the best is yet to come…

  8. Adrienne J

    September 27, 2013 at 12:43 pm

    I feel for you! Last year was my year of struggle and I did not think I’d be able to get back to my old self but I have. Take it one task at a time. It will get better.

  9. lynn

    September 27, 2013 at 12:54 pm

    Hang in there! I’ve been going through something similar these last few months and it’s so, so hard. But it has been getting better, slowly, and I hope it will for you, too. :)

  10. sarah

    September 27, 2013 at 12:57 pm

    Good luck to you while you fight the good fight. Sending good thoughts your way. I’m going through my own 37 year old malaise, and OH! to not have ALL THE FEEEELLLLIIIINGS to such a degree would be SUCH a gift. In the moments when things are ok, it’s such a contrast. But I’m thankful for those moments, and working on not fearing them when they re-emerge. you aren’t alone :)

  11. Angella

    September 27, 2013 at 12:58 pm

    Love you, friend. You’ll get there. You have my number any time you need to talk. xoxo

  12. Melissa

    September 27, 2013 at 1:09 pm

    2012 was that year for me. (My mom died of cancer and we were trying to sell our house and my husband was commuting 4.5-5hrs every day, and during it all, I was pregnant.) What started out as stress turned into a freefall.

    With help and time, you’ll find yourself again… not the same “you” as before, but an even better version because you’ll be able to use your experience to reach out to others. At least for me, that has been the best kind of healing.

    I know that just sharing this takes a lot of courage. Sending hugs & good thoughts your way.

  13. Kathleen

    September 27, 2013 at 1:15 pm

    Breathing a sigh of relief for you. Xo

  14. Erica W

    September 27, 2013 at 1:22 pm

    Thanks for sharing – sending positive vibes your way :)

  15. Tracy

    September 27, 2013 at 1:38 pm

    Hope you’re feeling more like yourself soon.
    I know it is exhausting to act like you feel fine when you just…don’t. And knowing that so many people have it so much worse, and that I’m SO lucky, but I still can’t get past this, — only made me feel like MORE of a loser.
    I have been there, and I fought against it for a long time, but anti-depressants help. They really do, and you don’t have to be on them for the rest of your life. I was on them for a little over a year. And without them, I don’t konw if I would have ever gotten over the hump.