A New Baby — First Time vs. Second Time

First Time:

Breastfeeding is done in the privacy of my bedroom – complete with a perfectly-placed My Brest Friend pillow, a brand new pink Bravado nursing tank and an online breastfeeding log.

Second Time:

Breastfeeding is done at my kitchen table – baby is in a one-armed cradle hold while I eat a Chipotle Carnitas bowl while donning a ratty, stained tee pulled up to my shoulders.

First Time:

A week after delivery, I’m physically feeling a little pep in my step.

Second Time:

A week after delivery, I feel as though my pelvic floor will fall out of my body if I so much as sneeze.

First Time:

Completely sleep deprived and exhausted.

Second Time:

Completely sleep deprived and exhausted with a three-year-old who is most decidedly NOT sleep deprived and exhausted.

First Time:

Could spend hours staring at my sweet, sleeping baby.

Second Time:

Yeah. That one pretty much hasn’t changed.

(Looking at Wito’s newborn photos, it’s uncanny how much these two resemble each other. Siblings FTW!)

What about you? What am I forgetting, first time/second time-wise?

  • Angella

    July 5, 2010 at 9:40 am

    Can’t answer the question – too busy sighing over the beautiful sleeping babies.
    .-= Angella´s last blog ..There’s A Hole In My Heart =-.

  • andrea

    July 5, 2010 at 9:52 am

    Darling! The second time around is a trip. It is amazing how anal I was about everything with Charlie and with Lu things just happened and eventually everything fell into a pretty laid back pace.

  • Jammer

    July 5, 2010 at 9:53 am

    they look like the same baby! and, so quiet but for some reason I think the quiet thing could be misleading…
    .-= Jammer´s last blog ..Flashbacks and JELL-O =-.

  • jora

    July 5, 2010 at 9:56 am

    First Time: consulting The Baby Book over each and every hiccup, sneeze, poop, etc.

    Second Time: lucky to make it to the Well Baby appointments on time.
    .-= jora´s last blog ..Please Meet My FriendRomesco =-.

  • Trinity(of haiku tofu)

    July 5, 2010 at 10:00 am

    They look so much alike! Aww, a little girl who is as cute as Wito? That’s gonna be too much!
    .-= Trinity(of haiku tofu)´s last blog ..Red Coconut Curry with Tangy Tempeh =-.

  • Melissa

    July 5, 2010 at 10:08 am

    Yep, it’s crazy with two, but it’s also very very awesome. For me, the newborn part was SO much easier in a lot of ways compared to dealing with a 3-yr old!

    First time around: baby was on a by-the-book sleeping schedule.

    Second time around: schedule? sleep? Oh shit, hang on while I get your older brother out of the spice cupboard…

    Enjoy those two beautiful children, there’s nothing like watching your kids discover each other and start interacting!

  • emily bilbrey

    July 5, 2010 at 10:09 am

    beautiful! her hairline is amazing – such lovely intricate swirls!

    i already know that if i have a second baby, things will be different next time. they have to be! i think it’s pretty inevitable. i love the comparisons you made in this post – can’t wait to hear more of your story as a mama of two (and of course, to see more photos of your lovely new girl!)


    Actually, the first photo is of Wito!

    .-= emily bilbrey´s last blog ..wordless wednesday- number twenty-five arriving soon – uff da 20- =-.

  • Mama Bub

    July 5, 2010 at 10:10 am

    How is it that the three year old is SO MUCH HARDER than the newborn?! Makes me wonder why I ever thought this was so hard the first time around.

    And the sneeze fear, I hear you loud and clear. Four weeks later I’m still a little bit afraid.
    .-= Mama Bub´s last blog ..The Fourth- Three Times =-.

  • Danielle (elleinadspir)

    July 5, 2010 at 10:45 am

    We were looking at pics last night and B commented how much she looks like Wito. So cute!!
    .-= Danielle (elleinadspir)´s last blog ..Food Glorious Food – Part 12 Okie Caviar =-.

  • SAJ

    July 5, 2010 at 10:53 am

    Wow. They do look alike. Disregard my “She looks like D!” comment earlier. Shows you what I know.

    She looks so darling and sweet. Deep sighs of envy over here :)
    .-= SAJ´s last blog ..15 minute post =-.

  • Rachel Shingleton

    July 5, 2010 at 11:26 am

    Sweet little baby girl! I love it!

    Hmm, no advice here as we are still in the only-child era. My sincere hope is that I will be so much calmer the second time around in everything. I was such a spazz from the second I peed on a stick til he turned 6 months old.

  • Tina

    July 5, 2010 at 11:54 am

    I’ve got just one…who is 3, so I cannot imagine juggling another one while dealing with all his energy. She really is a beautiful little bambino. Would love to know how to pronounce her name? Did I miss that answer?
    Hope you are getting rest and feeling well.

    Her name is pronounced ‘muh-LOO’. :)

  • Kim

    July 5, 2010 at 12:33 pm

    The first time: The first year seemed/felt like it was never going to end.

    The second time: Where the hell did the first year go????

  • Elyse

    July 5, 2010 at 1:17 pm

    The breastfeeding one cracked me up! It is so true.
    How about:

    First Time: Dress to go out in full makeup and cute outfit so no one will think that you are anything less than SuperMom.

    Second time: Big props to whoever invented black yoga pants. The mom uniform you can sleep, workout, and run errands in.

  • bethany actually

    July 5, 2010 at 1:22 pm

    I already feel like my pelvic floor might fall out with every sneeze, and I’m only 18 weeks along. :-) She really does look like Wito!
    .-= bethany actually´s last blog ..Happy 4th of July- =-.

  • newmom

    July 5, 2010 at 2:06 pm

    Beautiful! Thank you for this. I am about to embark on this journey for a second time and it’s reassuring to read your blog (sleep deprivation and all). All the best to you and good luck with the pelvic floor muscles. I remember that from last time. UGH!

  • Danielle

    July 5, 2010 at 3:33 pm

    She really is gorgeous. The second time around, I remember looking back at myself with a newborn the first time and thinking, YOU THOUGHT THAT WAS HARD? TAKING CARE OF A NEWBORN IS EASY! WHO IS GOING TO TAKE CARE OF THE 2yo HOOLIGAN RUNNING AMOK IN HERE?

    Y’all hang in there; as with everything, it gets easier.

  • Annika

    July 5, 2010 at 4:02 pm

    Awww, baby.
    .-= Annika´s last blog ..Decide My Future- =-.

  • Ashley

    July 5, 2010 at 5:42 pm

    First time – jumping at every sneeze, sigh or snort (if your children snorted as mine do) second time – waiting as long as possible to go into the room, in hopes of a child falling dreamlessly back to sleep….then getting up anyways just to be sure
    .-= Ashley´s last blog ..Its a Wobbling Giveaway- =-.

  • verdemama

    July 5, 2010 at 9:16 pm

    I only have one so far so I can’t add to the first/second comparison, but I do know that I was SCARED SH!TLESS with my first one, and I *hope* that’s different with the second one. (Please, please tell me it’s different with the second one.)

    Those are some beautiful babes you have there. :)
    .-= verdemama´s last blog ..July 4 =-.

  • Annie

    July 5, 2010 at 9:57 pm

    First time: coming home and getting to be the “patient.”

    Second time: lifting the toddler into his crib despite the fact that there are other adults there and also despite the fact that you had major surgery just a few days before…all because you’re the mommy and “mommy” trumps “patient” every time.

    Third time: “you were in the hospital? Welcome back, now can we have some lunch?”
    .-= Annie´s last blog ..I have 30 seconds Lets see how fast I can type =-.

  • HollyLynne

    July 5, 2010 at 10:44 pm

    Oh, wait . . . I was supposed to wait for the second to nurse and eat at the same time? Oops :)
    Both of your babies are just gorgeous!
    .-= HollyLynne´s last blog ..I Still Exist- =-.

  • Lori

    July 5, 2010 at 11:16 pm

    1st time: My Mom came for 7 days and we waved happily as her plane took off.
    2nd time: Newborn, plus 20-month-old. Mom came for 2.5 weeks and I cried when she left.

  • Natalie

    July 6, 2010 at 2:51 am

    Aww the quilt tucked over your bub in the last photo has such a cool pattern on it! Where did it come from?

    Is D helping with the newborn and Wito?

  • Ninabi

    July 6, 2010 at 6:10 am

    21 years ago I had a newborn and a 2.5 year old, in a circle military spouses who all gave birth to their second child within days (or even minutes) of each other.

    I remember not getting enough sleep. I do recall a cheap umbrella stroller I could pop open with one hand- the toddler would jump in on her own and the new baby was worn tied to my front in a carrier that seemed like a pregnancy reenactment and off we’d go. We’d meet, those other new mothers and me, and try to remember, Did we ever have careers? Or take a few hours to get a fresh hairstyle?

    But we were delighted to have our little ones and we’ve all kept in close touch no matter how many moves and miles apart we are. I’m glad no only for my children, but for the friends I made because of their very being.

    Wito seems like a dear little boy- that he adores his little sister is wonderful! (I remember a distinctly opposite response in my daughter, complete with toilet training regression the day I walked in the door with the new baby).

    I think in some ways (sleep aside) it is easier- there’s less worry over the small things, more confidence in holding an infant. A bit more time and work to get back into shape.

    A few years from now you’ll be looking back on this magical time and wondering, How did I do it….?

    Enjoy your two absolutely beautiful children. They really, really are.

  • anie

    July 6, 2010 at 9:08 am

    first time: laundry got done while baby slept
    second time: laundry got done one load at a time, on what seemed like one load a month schedule

    first time: meals could still be healthy~going to the grocery store wasn’t too much of a chore as I was taking my sweet baby out and showing her off to the world
    second time: realizing we can’t have mac & cheese again or else CPS was going to show up and haul me away. had to drag out an actual cookbook to see what to make in 100 degree weather that would be healthy. and all those meals I so lovingly prepared and bought a chest freezer to store them in? See note on 100 degree weather, add a colicky baby and subtract any chance of air conditioning magically installing itself in our home. Turn on the oven to bake a lasagna? Not happening! Maybe that mac & cheese can go one more round???
    .-= anie´s last blog ..showgirlship =-.

  • tasha mulligan

    July 6, 2010 at 10:01 am

    the second time around requires somes pelvic floor exercises to get yourself back without the feeling of “the bottom falling out”. I have found great information at a site called hab-it.com. Fantastic!

  • calee

    July 6, 2010 at 11:29 am

    1st time: New outfit with ever diaper change (or at least 2x a day)
    2nd time: This doesn’t smell yet, right? And who knows the last time he got a bath. Friday?

    That may be the girl vs boy difference playing out too.

  • am'ti b

    July 6, 2010 at 2:31 pm

    very sweet.

  • Suniverse

    July 6, 2010 at 7:08 pm

    I just have the one, which was plenty for me, but oh, my god, how cute are your babies! And this from someone who is not a fan of babies. Nice work.

  • Siera

    July 7, 2010 at 11:33 am

    Only having one, I can’t share my experience with one child vs. two.I do remember the early days of breast feeding. Everything had to be just so. I had to have my nursing pillow, water, nipple cream, receiving blanket, privacy blanket if in public etc. Breastfeeding was akward at first. A few months into it and I’d whip my tatas out anywhere to appease my screaming child; even in the check-out at the grocery store.

  • Lisa

    July 7, 2010 at 1:42 pm

    We are still working on our first, but wow – they do look alike don’t they?

  • G

    July 7, 2010 at 1:43 pm

    First time: “Sleep when the baby sleeps.”

    Second time: Desperately hope they nap at the same time for at least a few minutes.

    Third time: HA!!! Survive on no sleep because baby was up until 2am and the Kindergartener has to wake up at 6:30am for school.
    .-= G´s last blog ..Grr- =-.

  • Kerri Anne

    July 7, 2010 at 4:23 pm

    They seriously look like the same baby! Soo adorable.
    .-= Kerri Anne´s last blog ..Snapshots Of A Season In Progress =-.

  • elz

    July 7, 2010 at 8:03 pm

    First One- You don’t leave the house with the baby until the Pediatrician tells you at 6 weeks to take child outside. Then, obsess about germs! and dirt! and disease!

    Second One- Take baby out at day four because someone needs to get the groceries.

    Sibling baby photos are the best. My girls’ baby pictures are so close, we play the “which baby”‘ game all the time. She’s so precious.
    .-= elz´s last blog ..9 Years of Knowing =-.

  • GirlsGoneChild

    July 7, 2010 at 11:21 pm

    I love her and you and this post. xo

  • Megan

    July 8, 2010 at 6:51 am

    That is so true Sarah! I just had my second girl in May and it is amazing how quickly having only one seems easy. Someone told me the other day that the hardest part of having a newborn is having a toddler!

    I am now an expert at making lunch while breastfeeding :)

  • ali

    July 8, 2010 at 10:18 am

    they are twins!
    .-= ali´s last blog ..Stepford Road Trip Anyone =-.

  • Kristen

    July 8, 2010 at 4:54 pm

    Sooo true. But you forgot to mention the rice remnants of the Chipotle Carnitas bowl that have fallen from the fork onto your breastfeeding baby’s head. Especially when nursing with RIghty Boob (forcing you to eat with shaky Lefty Hand. Or maybe that’s just me).

  • Jen

    July 9, 2010 at 7:51 am

    First time breastfed behind a closed door when we had visitors. This time everyone and their mother gets to see my boob.

  • Chiada

    July 9, 2010 at 2:22 pm

    She’s absolutely PERFECT. I’ve never seen a more beautiful baby. Many congratulations and well wishes headed your way!

  • Lara Jane

    July 11, 2010 at 6:22 pm

    Gorgeous, both times!

    I have a 10-year-old and that’s it (not by choice, I feel like I have to defend myself for some reason…), but I was never shy about flopping it out when it was nursing time.

    If God does decide to grant me with another wee one, I’m glad I have an extra pair of helpful hands. :)

  • Elizabeth @ Table for Five

    July 11, 2010 at 6:27 pm

    She looks so much like her brother! Congratulations on your beautiful little girl. I remember writing thank you notes for the baby gifts for number two while holding him in one arm and reading a story to two year old number one at the same time. Multitasking Moms FTW!
    .-= Elizabeth @ Table for Five´s last blog ..Traditional 4th of July S-8217mores =-.

  • Dr. Heather

    July 12, 2010 at 2:34 pm

    Love this. Congrats on your baby girl. We loosened up for each additional baby so much that now, with #4, we just leave her at home alone with the remote control and a fresh bottle (kidding). ;) Seriously, though, having a baby AND a toddler in the house was the hardest thing I’ve ever done — and we now have 4 kiddos. Our youngest is 8 months old and it’s way easier now, with 4, than when I had just the baby and the toddler. Hang in there and things will ease up eventually!