21

The Magic Number

I’ve been chatting via email with the lovely Amanda about our newborns. Avelyn is about 2 weeks ahead of Wito so it’s been very helpful to hear what the future has in store for me from a fresh perspective. When I was in the depths of sleep-deprivation wondering if I truly had lost my mind, she told me to hang on until the 6-week mark because things would definitely improve.

Amanda, you were so right. Hell yeah.

Wito turned six weeks old last Friday. Up until Friday night, he was only sleeping between 1.5 and 3 hours at a time. And trust me, the 3-hour sleep stretches were few and far between (as the massive baggage under my eyes will prove). Well, Friday night he slept for 5 hours, Saturday night he slept for 5.5 and drum roll please…

Last night, Wito slept from 9 pm to 3:30 am.

Sweet Jebus above let your glorious love rain down on me.

I’m so happy, I’m drinking vodka on the rocks with three olives at 3:00 pm. Um, er, of COURSE, I’m not drinking vodka on the rocks with three olives at 3:00 pm. I’m a breastfeeding mother! What kind of person do you think I am? I only drink vodka on the rocks with three olives at 6:00 pm, people. Jesus.

Although, Wito? Changing your sleeping patterns on the EXACT day of your 6-week birthday? Do you have to be so damn predictable? Where’s the mystery? The intrigue? It certainly isn’t very David Copperfield of you…

I’m kidding. Jinx City. I take it back! I mean, I LOVE PREDICTABILITY! I’m sure the ladies will swoon when you call at 8:00 on the dot like you said!! No one likes a smoldering man of mystery! Schedules RULE!

When D and I both woke up last night around 2:30 am, we looked at each other and in unison, asked the age-old virgin parent question, “Do you think he’s dead?”

Of course, I mean “virgin” as in “new parent”, not “chastity belt”…I mean, how would we have made a baby? Hello? Are you out there?

Crickets.

So, we both tiptoed across the world’s creakiest wood floors into his room and stood over the crib, wide-eyed, staring at our perfectly motionless baby. Now normally, this kid is the loudest eater, sleeper, pooper, etc. But not last night. D had to put his hand on his chest ever so softly (because mother fucker, if you wake him I will shove my foot so far up your ass) to make sure he was breathing. And of course he was. So we tiptoed back to our bedroom and instead of going back to sleep, we sat there watching the clock, wondering when he would wake up.

We waited one hour. Yes, instead of resting our tired and pathetic asses, we sat around in the middle of the night waiting for our baby to wake up.

This parenting gig is unbelievable.

dull.jpg

Life around here is so dull.

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21 Comments
  • Torrie

    September 18, 2006 at 3:40 pm

    I dig you.

  • Sarcomical

    September 18, 2006 at 5:50 pm

    awww…so sweet. look at you two. :)

    p.s. what’s the story of that painting in the mirror? someone you know?

    p.p.s. i want to kind of maybe take advantage of having your cell number some day and say hey but what’s the protocol on new parents’ talking time?

    love you guys.

  • ms. sizzle

    September 18, 2006 at 5:54 pm

    you’re hilarious whoorl. and really? i think you should wait until 10pm for the vodka.

    ;) sizz

  • BeachMama

    September 18, 2006 at 6:00 pm

    We’ve all done that. Wait until he sleep all night long and you wake up every few hours, just waiting for him to wake up.

  • Sarah

    September 18, 2006 at 6:58 pm

    It is so true, that the times they finally sleep, you end up waking up anyway…or let me rephrase that…your boobs end up waking you up.

  • Jennifer

    September 18, 2006 at 7:42 pm

    Must be the magic number. I remember evicting baby from our room at 6 weeks and having her sleep through the night also. Being that she was our second child we just looked at the rise and fall of her bum (tummy sleeper) on the video monitor and giggled as each hour passed and she was still sleeping.

  • rebecca

    September 18, 2006 at 8:32 pm

    Um, yeah… I remember those days of waking up and wondering when the baby was going to wake up! Especially when the boobs were SO ready for him to wake up if ya know what I mean.

    Isn’t it funny how your standards change? All of a sudden you’re all “Yeah! I love sleeping until 2:30 am! Badass!”

  • Sheree

    September 18, 2006 at 9:26 pm

    Yay for longer sleeps! :) Just keep in mind that it probably won’t last forever. Lots of babes start waking up again around 6-7 mos when they go thru growth spurts and developmental spurts. Those babies like to keep us on our toes!

  • trish

    September 19, 2006 at 12:50 am

    My 12 week old little boy is now sleeping from 9pm until 5:30. The difference is absolutely unbelievable and 5:30 am feels like heaven!

  • Rachel

    September 19, 2006 at 5:10 am

    We just finished week 7 and we’re sleeping about 5 hours through the night as well. I’ve got it timed to be 11 or 12 until 4 or 5 because that’s damn near normal hours! WOOOO!

    The first few times she slept more than 2 hours, I had to go in and check on her and make sure she was still there. Sure enough, she shows no signs of wanting to get her own apartment just yet.

  • Jessie

    September 19, 2006 at 5:29 am

    He looks pretty content in that picture. Congrats on getting more sleep! I can’t imagine how happy that must make you.

  • Elizabeth

    September 19, 2006 at 6:59 am

    Isn’t it incredible the things that parenting will make you do. The first time Hunter slept for 8+ hours, I had to wake him up because my chest was going to explode – oh the joys of breastfeeding. Sweet sweet sleep. Congratulations!

  • eM

    September 19, 2006 at 7:06 am

    Yay!!! Congrats :)
    The first time our little sweetie slept from 10 until 4 or 5 we woke up and had the same freaky fear. She was fine and now at 4 months sleeps for a 5-8 hour block and then a 2-hour block most nights.

    He’s such a cutie–enjoy it now, but really, it only does get more fun.

  • Angella

    September 19, 2006 at 8:30 am

    Yes, Amanda is swell :)

    And I totally remember doing the same thing when my first started sleeping longer in the night. His first 7 hour stretch was great – for him. I lay awake.

    Anders is getting cuter by the day!

  • Lisa Hanson

    September 19, 2006 at 8:39 am

    oh, you crack me up…i love hearing these stories about Anders and new parenting – i’m due in Feb. with my fist ankle biter, so keep your stories coming!
    Cheers!
    P.S. where can i order myself up one of those “predictable infants”?

  • Amanda

    September 19, 2006 at 8:55 am

    A pleasantly predictable baby makes for a rested and happy momma. You are doing a fantastic job and Anders is delicious!

  • Leah

    September 19, 2006 at 11:39 am

    You know, he looked just like D when he first came out, but now he’s a little Whoorlito without a doubt. Just gorgeous, just like his mama.

  • Darren McLikeshimself

    September 19, 2006 at 7:21 am

    Wow! I can’t believe it’s been six weeks already! He looks great, though!

  • Kaili

    September 19, 2006 at 10:17 pm

    Oh my goodness, Anders’ is so darn cute!
    We get the whole “oh my god is he alive??” moment. The first time Jaia slept for a BIG chunk of time, we were like, “did that just happen!!???!”. Usually in the day when he sleeps I end up doing stupid stuff, then once he wakes up I am kicking myself cause I could have done something productive (yeah right!).
    Parenting is funny!

  • Sarah

    September 20, 2006 at 11:33 am

    It is so nice when they finally go a long stretch, the only problem then is the only one sleeping is the baby! I hope you get get to enjoy the long stretches yourself soon.

  • Monica

    September 20, 2006 at 4:26 pm

    hmmm, did you have mamalikey co-write this post???