Hair Thursday

I’m currently pretending to work on Hair Thursday with a camera crew surrounding me. I hope my hair looks good, people.

My Head. It Has Not Been Reattached.

Well, hello! Here I am. Headless.

Things haven’t really simmered down on the home front nor the Hair Thursday front. I returned Friday from Oklahoma, where Wito was cared for (read: spoiled rotten) while I was prancing around New York with TV makeup on.

I ask of you, television guest or high class hooker?

It’s a tough call, my friends. I’m sure the makeup was spot-on for the cameras, but the six business men who shared an elevator ride with me in my trench coat afterwards probably assumed the latter. You should have seen me walking into my hotel, just waiting for the manager to pull me aside, all Pretty Woman-style. (Excuse me, madam. Where do YOU think you’re going?)

Although, I’m happy to say I would have kept those false lashes on for the rest of my life if I had the chance. (Dear unbelievably awesome hair and makeup team, any chance I could get you to move to California? I make really good margaritas! Love, Whoorl.) As for the television appearance, I will let you know as soon as I get an air date so we can all laugh together at my rambling in front of a live studio audience.

Gulp.

Speaking of the television show, did I mention that the week before my trip to New York, field producers were sent to my house to film an at-home interview, as well as some additional footage of my day-to-day activities? One of those day-to-day activities was me bloggity blogging on my computer, and only in the middle of filming my hands typity-typing did I realize that my nails were possibly atrocious.

Guitar lessons + nails = Not Pretty. ZOMFG.

My living room was completely inundated with bright lights, microphones, people, cords, did I mention people? Yes, people staring at me while I talked about lord knows what. It was truly an surreal experience.

Fast forward to the present. Wito has had a fever of 102-103.5 for the past 36 hours. He’s a sick little dude, and I am taking him to the pediatrician in a couple of hours. My house is in its normal post-weekend state (DEMOLISHED) and guess who’s coming over in 5 hours?

ABC NIGHTLINE.

It’s clearly a slow news week. Let’s recap - messy house, sick baby and Oh, OH! Nothing to wear. Send help.

(At least my nails are manicured this time around. Positive thinking RULES.)

Hair Thursday - Vol. 2.13

First things first. You guys, the craziness. THE CRAZINESS.

I’m currently in Oklahoma trying to catch my breath after a whirlwind trip to New York City this week.

(Deep breaths.)

And I have so much to tell you, but I simply can not until I get back to California and reattach my head.

Thanks to these ladies for making my last night in New York a fantastic one.

Metalia, Isabel, Deb, Sarah, Heather and Rebecca (with her new, soon-to-be-disclosed do)

Luckily, I had today’s Hair Thursday feature finished in my drafts. Viva la planning!

Enjoy, and I’ll be talking to you soon.

Amy’s Hair:

Light brown with lighter ends from sun exposure
Doesn’t want to highlight - too much upkeep
Healthy, very fine, stick straight
Likes shoulder-length or longer
Very interested in bangs, but is nervous about the commitment
Spends 1-5 minutes styling

While reading Amy’s questionnaire, three quotes jumped out at me.

“I really want long bangs, or maybe even shorter bangs for that matter, but I want them to sweep perfectly to the side, which they will do, but only if I blow them dry (and even then they don’t always go the side how I want), and I am lazy, and rushed and don’t always want to do that.”

“Every now and then, when I have time, I’ll blow out my hair and use a round brush. I like the way that looks.”

“I think my fine hair needs some layers because it’s so damn flat, but I look at pictures of my hair all one length and really like that look too. I am indecisive. Plus, I only like the layers when I take the time to blow it out. If I let my hair air dry, I hate them. I don’t always want to dry my hair everyday.”

In a nutshell, Amy likes her hair when she spends time on it, but doesn’t enjoy putting forth the effort. Um, might I refer you back to my Hair Thursday commandments?

I wish I could show Amy a fabulous haircut that morphs itself perfectly on the head without lifting a finger, but my feverish efforts to create a Hairstyle In A Can are not proving futile. Good hair requires effort, good hair requires effort, good hair requires effort. Say it with me, folks.

Here’s the deal, though. Good hair doesn’t require tons of effort! Just a little bit, and that’s what I’m asking of Amy. For instance, the bangs situation. On most days, I allow my hair to air dry, but still dry my bangs. It takes all of 2 minutes. 120 seconds, people. Should that even be considered “effort”? TWO MINUTES? Yet, I’m happy with the results. I’m not asking for back-breaking, brow-sweating effort over here.

{End tirade.}

So! Let’s look at some options for Amy.

Option #1 leaves Amy’s length intact. Long, sideswept bangs and layers around the face would give Amy the look of bangs without the upkeep. These type of long layers grow out easily, so she wouldn’t be dealing with multiple bang trims. I also would recommend using a light pomade around the front layers for some texture and movement, which would really help mask Amy’s color issues (since she doesn’t want to highlight to even out her color).

Option #2 is a would be such a chic look for Amy. First off, cutting off the length would get rid of her bleached-out ends and even out her color. Secondly, the bangs are still sideswept (easier to maintain than blunt), and wouldn’t require too much effort. This type of style is perfect for Amy’s fine, super-straight hair. Just a little bit of time on the bangs and she could head out the door.

Enough of my blathering, what do you think?

Marisa’s hair:

Dark brown, with lighter brown highlights
Healthy, despite swimming twice a week
Very thick, but individual strands are very fine
Lots of volume
Prefers current length or shorter
Spends 15 minutes or less on styling
Doesn’t own a blow dryer or any heat tools
Triathlete, needs to keep hair off face while exercising

I’m going to go out on a limb and assume that Marisa’s wavy hair is of the “shorter you cut it, the less wavy it is” camp. If you look at her photo on the right, you can tell the top of her hair is relatively straight. With that in mind, take a look at these options.

Option #1 would involve some light layering all over with very minimal piecey bangs. Marisa doesn’t need to cut the bangs if she doesn’t want, as I’m more concerned with her stylist cutting light, texturized layers to help give the waves more bounce. As I’ve mentioned before, texturized layers blend very well, so Marisa could easily pull her hair off her face.

Option #2 would be a great style for the upcoming summer months. It’s super stylish and would be a great short cut for her triathlete training. Marisa would only need a bobby pin to keep the front off her face while exercising, and it would dry quickly after her weekly swims. The shape of the style is very versatile - it would look great air-dried or flat-ironed for an occasional sleek look.

What say you, friends?

A Very, Very Special Hair Thursday - Vol. 2.12

This week, every single one of your votes count. SERIOUSLY.

Meet Rebecca, whose future hairstyle is completely in your hands.

Rebecca’s hair:

Dark blonde with lighter blonde highlights
Normal condition, thick and straight
Likes her hair somewhat long, but is open to a shorter bob style
Wears ponytails quite often
Spends about 10 minutes on hair - mostly blowdrying, but uses a flat iron if needed
Is very knowledgeable about products

Rebecca recently gave birth to a beautiful baby girl and is looking to freshen up her style. Not being interested in super short styles, I wanted to offer some options that could really change her overall look without chopping it all off.

Take a look.

Option #1 would be a new, sleek and modern look for Rebecca. This one-length, texturized bob with an extremely slight angle would be perfect for Rebecca’s straight hair type and face shape. Add some lighter blond highlights and Va Va Voom!

Option #2 would hit just above the collarbone, with sideswept bangs and layering around the face. This too would look fantastic on Rebecca, plus giving her more versatility with the addition of sideswept bangs. (And we all love ponytail bangs, am I right?)

Here’s where it gets interesting. Normally, I post the new styles, you vote and the participant has the option of going forward with the cut. No one is actually dragging the participant to his or her stylist.

Well, this time, your votes will determine the winning style and Miss Rebecca WILL be receiving that exact style in the very near future. WHICH WILL THEN BE REVEALED ON NATIONAL TELEVISION.

(SQUEEEE!)

You heard me right. When I close Rebecca’s poll on Saturday at midnight, her new style will be all your doing. (Well, actually, a very experienced stylist’s doing, but you catch my drift.)

So, get to it, my friends. Make me proud!

A Word Of Caution

Ketel One martinis + The New York Times anticipation = Ouch.

Ladies and gents, I’ve had a crazy week. You see, I’ve been on vacation with my family, which included a little bit of this:

La Cucaracha from whoorl on Vimeo.

(Wait, doesn’t everyone have a 6-foot statue of Captain Hook included in their vacation rental?)

A little bit of this:

And, a little bit of this:

Look at those cheeks. MONCH MONCH MONCH.

Meanwhile, my job responsibilities over here are morphing a bit, and of course, the New York Times article made its appearance and rendered this site inoperable for several hours.

As much as I would like to pretend that I calmly waited for Thursday morning’s arrival by speaking phrases such as, “The NYT’s Thursday Style section is quite a treat and the piece should be just delightful, my dears. Now, pass the bubbly, Ronald!”, that’s not exactly how it went down.

On Wednesday, the butterflies made their presence known. The interview and photo shoot were both so exciting, but I really had no idea about the size and scope of the article. By 4pm, I had decided with the utmost certainty that the title of the article would be:

NEUROTIC WOMAN POLLS INTERNET ON HAIR CHOICES WHILE CHILDREN STARVE.

My family decided I was in need of some adult beverages. Now, I usually have no issues with drinking a martini (need to create a new, exciting dinner? Try drinking a martini! Just watch the cooking improvisation unfold!), but the adrenaline building in my body created some sort of catalyst, hurling me into the galaxy of drunkity DRUNK.

(Two martinis! Just two!)

(Drunk, I tell you!)

D and I returned home around 10:30pm, I set the alarm for 6:00am (our local coffee shop only sells 5 copies of the NYT and I HAD TO HAVE ONE. Or three.), and clumsily plopped my head on the pillow.

Whoah. Spinning.

I groggily mumbled “UGH”, grabbed my pillow and trudged into the living room, where I attempted to watch the nightly news with one hand covering my left eye. You know, to reduce the television rotation.

(Two martinis! Just two!)

(Lightweight, I tell you!)

I must have succumbed to one hell of a deep slumber because I woke up at 2am on the couch, completely disoriented and apparently very hot, evidenced by my turning the thermostat ALL THE WAY in one direction to cool off the room.

I made it to the bedroom, crashed into bed and immediately fell asleep.

What happened next can only be described as moderately painful. The alarm went off. My mouth was dry. It felt incredibly hot in the bedroom. I stumbled into the living room, or what felt like the fiery pit of hell, looked at the thermostat and the room temperature was registering a balmy 86 degrees. I had turned the thermostat the wrong direction.

(Two martinis! Just two!)

(Idiot, I tell you!)

Did any of you see the Sex and The City episode where Miranda drinks 1,000 martinis with the extremely good-looking detective and wakes up with the worst hangover in the history of mankind?

That was me.

Still not getting a crystal clear visual?

How about this.

Luckily, I made it to the coffee shop in one piece. Wearing jeans, my pajama top, and smelling of vodka. I’m pretty sure I couldn’t have PAID anyone to believe that was me in the photo.

Let this be a lesson to you all. Butterflies and alcohol do not mix. Go forth and spread the word, my friends.

Wow.

OMFGBLAHDEEBLHAHAHAAGLAAAG.

Yes, I think that accurately explains how I feel this morning.

Click here for the online version.

Why I Said Goodbye To Twitter

1. I read this.

2. I noticed my laptop was open. A LOT.

3. My whoorl posts were decreasing.

4. My ParentDish posts were decreasing.

5. I wasn’t reading any blogs.

6. Yet, I was spending twice as much time on the internet.

Doing what, you ask?

Twittering. Lots of twittering. I honestly had no idea how much cumulative time I was spending reading and writing on Twitter. So, I quit. Cold turkey.

(I really miss it.)

However, the instant decrease of LOP (Laptop Open Position) has been incredible. Thus, I am happy. The End.

(Although, my old Twitter pals! How are you? Have you had a good week? Any interesting tidbits? GOOD GOD, THE THINGS I WANT TO TELL YOU THAT I CAN’T WRITE HERE! THE EXCITEMENT!)

*shutting laptop*

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