Rocky Mountain High


Wow. That is the cheesiest post title I have ever written. (Although, Zeus? Hera? Where’s the God of Teeth when you need him? and Memories, Light The Corner Of My Mind are additional fine options.)

I just don’t know where to begin. I mean, do you all even KNOW ME anymore? No, no, I don’t think you do, and the only way to remedy the situation is a quick post filled with written diarrhea.

Let’s see. I just returned from a quick trip to Denver and Boulder. As you may or may not know, my husband graduated from the University of Colorado and we wanted to check out his old stomping grounds while meeting up with his brother’s family. (Which included the most delicious 6-month-old ever.) The weather was beautiful, the leaves were starting to change, the air was crisp and the food was tasty.

We poked around neighborhoods and parks and generally fell over dead when we saw the housing prices. Houses that would easily be over the 2 million dollar mark in my beach community were literally, dare I say, remotely AFFORDABLE. Frankly, it makes me wonder, is the beach that worth it? Is the year-round perfect weather that worth it? Will I live in a small bungalow FOREVER AND EVER, GOD HELP ME?

Wait! That’s not all! The women? At the beautiful Colorado parks? Were NATURALLY attractive. NOT shot up with Botox, sporting blond extensions and Juicy Couture track suits! I did not see one bright yellow Hummer or flaming red Aston Martin. The people were friendly! With not a hint of passive aggressiveness!

OH MY GOD, Orange County, you are slowly killing my will to live.

(See? This is when I think I should continue not updating my blog. Do you really want to read this drivel?)

Also, I’m not the least bit ashamed to admit that I am almost physically ill that I finished reading the Twilight series. What in the hell am I supposed to do now? Blog or something? I love Edward and Bella, and I could care less if people think it was a poorly-written series because I could NOT put it down. Being a huge Anne Rice fan, I thought I would scoff at these books, but I loved them, oh how I loved them. Is there going to be a 5th book? Please, someone MAKE THE PAIN GO AWAY. If you absolutely loved Twilight, do you have any other books that you recommend I read? I belong to Goodreads, but I get lost in all of the millions and trillions of suggestions.

(Also, does anyone else wonder if by reading and thinking about vampires, you are sending out some sort of other-worldly wavelength for the vampires to come find you? No? Just forget I mentioned it.)

Now, if you are looking for something to make you laugh your ever-loving ass off, might I recommend Cringe by the lovely Sarah Brown? It’s a compilation of grade and high school journal entries that are some of the most hilarious pages I’ve read in any book.

(But I don’t WANT funny now! I want Edward and Bella! Wah.)

Help me find some sort of substitute before I am forced to read The Witching Hour for the fifth time.


The Backyardigans Have Become My Babysitter


Well, THAT Labor Day sure came and went.

Things have been a little chaotic over here. Roadtrip adventures to Idaho (multiple posts could not do it justice), planning for a last-minute trip to Colorado this weekend, gargling my heart while doing Jillian Michael’s 30 Day Shred (today is Day 11), submerging myself in the Twilight series (starting Book 4 right now – NO SPOILERS PLEASE), keeping up with my freelance work (including a new weekly column that has me so excited, I can’t stand it), and of course, taking care of Wito the man.

(Oh, did I mention that my beloved nanny who watched Wito two half-days a week while I worked on said freelance projects decided to double major? And left my cheese in the wind? And I have no help right now? While I’m trying to write, hmmm, let’s see, 3 weekly columns and 2 blogs, among other things such as RUNNING A HOUSEHOLD? Can you believe she would choose furthering her education over a nanny job? I mean, WHY AMY? DON’T YOU WANT TO BE A NANNY FOREVER?

(No? I see.)

So, yeah, on top of that, I’m in the midst of nanny interviews. We all remember how interesting that was last time, right?

I guess you could say I’m feeling a little overwhelmed right now. In a good way, though.

Meanwhile, while trying to get everything accomplished, Wito has developed a major obsession with The Backyardigans. Tyrone, specifically. Have any of you seen the Polka Palace Party epsiode? Well, that episode has BECOME my part-time nanny for the time being.

If you aren’t familiar, let me introduce you to the world of The Backyardigans.

And if you see an enormous toddler in a cowboy hat running around town singing “Yip! Yip! Yip! Yip!”, that would be my Wito. Go easy, his mother is a little frazzled right now.

Polka Party from whoorl on Vimeo.


Féria Party!


Something about the change of season makes me very antsy regarding the state of my hair. Suddenly, I want to dye it auburn or cut bolder bangs or chop it off in a sleek bob. However, with many experimental hair phases under my belt, I’ve come to the (sometimes VERY painful) realization what does and does not work for me.

In the defense of subtlety, sometimes a small color change can make the biggest difference when you are experiencing the hair blahs.

Two of my good friends recently shook off their doldrums with Féria’s new and improved home haircolor by L’Oreal. You know how some home haircolor brands have the tendency to look a little, um, FLAT? Well, Féria’s color spectrum delivers incredible color and triple highlights, plus a new built-in conditioning technology. Which means sayonara to flat color and hello to awesome, shimmering hair. (You can see all of the shades here.)

So, Holly and Andrea joined me for a little Féria party. Not only did these beauties get the chance to try out Féria’s new and improved haircolor, but they also got to dabble in a fair amount of L’Oreal makeup.

(Lucky bastards.)

Let’s take a look at Holly’s before photo.

Clearly, a GORGEOUS girl. (I’m pretty sure Holly could color her hair chartreuse and still look breathtaking.) Holly chose Féria #45 (Deep Bronzed Brown) and got down to business.

How ANYONE could look so perfectly cute with a towel wrapped around her head, I’ll never know.

And the new Holly!

The deep bronzed color really looks gorgeous. Don’t you think? (And seriously, what is UP with the shimmer? How does that technology work and HOW can I get my hands on it?)
*insert maniacal laughter here*

Let’s not forget my stunning friend, Andrea!

Andrea really wasn’t looking for much of a color change, but was more than happy to get in on some of that Féria shimmer action. She chose #40 (Deeply Brown), and it was the perfect match for her.

Take a look.

I was pleasantly surprised at the amount of instant shine and shimmer created from the coloring process. Andrea looks fantastic.

Thanks to these lovely ladies for letting me document their coloring process! Let’s do it again soon, shall we?


hair thursday makeover 47


Many of you might know our next participant, Tertia. She writes the popular blog, So Close, and is no stranger to internet polling. (In fact, her thoughts on the matter were part of this New York Times piece.)

Tertia’s hair:

Naturally dark brown with blond highlights
Chemically-processed hair, oily at roots
Thick hair with individually fine strands
Would prefer to keep length longer
Typical day involves a little bit of mousse and air dry
Doesn’t own styling tools
Wears ponytails 95% of the time
Lives in a Mediterranean environment

From Tertia’s email:

In a nutshell, it naturally has that half-grown-out, old perm look.  Flat on top, wavy on the ends.  Think thatched roof. I’ve worn it long for years, and I’m a ‘wash and wear’ type of girl.  However, because I have an impending midlife crisis on the horizon, I thought it might be time for a change.  But what type of style suits an almost 40 year old who has a long face, big ears and hair that naturally has the half-grown-out, old perm look?

Never fear, Tertia. We are here, ready to catapult you into your midlife crisis with a head of fantastic hair!

Let’s talk about good options for those of you with longer faces. Layers? Good. Sideswept bangs? Good. Shoulder length and/or a little longer? Good. Fullness around the face? Good.

Super short hair? Bad. Long hair with no layering and/or movement? BAD.

Let’s glance at Tertia’s photos again. Looking at the second photo, the thickness and texture of her hair is beautiful, right?  But do you notice how her long, all-one-length hair elongates her face? It’s as if that particular cut visually stretches her face longer.

However, you don’t need to say sayonara to long hair if you have a longer face shape – you just need to add fullness to give the illusion of a face less long or more rounded. OR you can add bangs to cut the length of the face off. (Sounds violent, but it works!)

Let’s take a look at the options.

Option #1 would involve Tertia taking a little length off and adding long layering around her face. Nothing too short if she doesn’t want to foray into bang territory, but just enough to add fullness around her face.

I’m not going to lie, Option #2 is my favorite. With this cut, Tertia could leave all the length in her hair, but add the sideswept bangs, which will not only give the illusion of a shorter face BUT will also balance out her strong jawline. Add a couple of additional subtle layers around the face and Tertia could continue to air-dry for a slightly messy, wavy look. Hot cut for a hot lady, am I right?

Tell her what you think.

I would also recommend Tertia have some lowlights added to her hair to give her a deeper base, yet allowing the lighter pieces to highlight her gorgeous eyes.

Alright! Moving on!

Our next participant is Anna:

Anna’s hair:

Natural copper color
Normal/oily condition
Medium-thick, straight with a little wave
Open to any length
Pulls hair halfway back during the course of the day

From Anna’s email:

I’m open to bangs, layers, anything, but I prefer a “simpler” style (not too trendy).  I basically don’t want layers all over the place or a style that’s really popular right now that doesn’t fit my face, which is long, and I have a high forehead.

Anna, I would kill for your hair color. KILL.

I think adding some subtle, sideswept bangs would be perfect for Anna. First off, like I mentioned before, bangs lessen the length of longer faces and since she pulls her hair halfway back more times than not, the bangs would give her more of a style.

Now, I don’t think Anna needs tons of bangs. Just some fringed pieces that can be swept to the side easily.

Like Option #1.

(Oh my Lord, is anyone else obsessed with Mad Men? I want to BE Joan Holloway with that red hair and those dresses. Alas, that will never happen unless I start shoving copious amounts of tissue into my bra.)

Also, when Anna has the time, curling her hair into loose waves with an iron like Option #1 would look beautiful with her hair color, plus adding fullness around her face to combat the longer face shape.

Now, #2 is an option if Anna doesn’t want to cut bangs. This cut would look super sleek with Anna’s straighter hair, but I wouldn’t let it get much longer than the photo, in order to combat the visual lengthening of the face. (In fact, the hair in this photo had a sharper angle, but I photoshopped the front length shorter because I’m a OCD freak like that.)

Which one would you prefer on Anna?