2008 July | whoorl

So You Think You Can Dance – Blogher Edition

July 25, 2008

I had such a fantastic time at Blogher. In a teeny nutshell, I was just so thrilled to be surrounded by smart, hilarious and well-rounded women instead of wiping dookie booty all day. (Can I get an AMEN?)

I think my personal high (LOW! LOW!) point of the weekend had to be “dancing” at the Mighty Haus launch party. Now, one would think that upon being invited to a party hosted by the lovely Maggie Mason, you would keep a certain air of composure about yourself as you navigate through the space and guests. And I did that…for about the first hour or so.

It’s just that people started to dance. And I really didn’t WANT to dance, but bodies were filing onto the dance floor and my adrenaline started pumping, and well, you’ll see.

Lucky for you, after noticing some photos on Flickr (thanks to Greeblemonkey and Mrs. Flinger), I can recreate this atrocity for your viewing pleasure with a mere five photos.

Photo #1:

There I am, making my way onto the dance floor. You can smell the determination in the air, can’t you?

Photo #2:

Here is my trademark warm-up maneuver. I like to walk around the floor, clapping my hands next to my ear, much like the Paso Doble. Look how Heather is rendered helpless by my matador-like movement. There is no denying it, she wants me.

Photo #3:

After the blood starts pumping, I launch into a contemporary performance art piece that Mia Michaels might as well have choreographed herself. Now, to the untrained eye, it seems I’m attempting the Charleston, but check out the back of my shirt. See how it’s airborne? This could only mean I’m at the tail end of David Lee Roth-type jumping maneuver. Leslie and Alana are AMAZED by my dancing prowess.

Photo #4:

Seriously, I have no idea.

Photo #5:

The pièce de résistance. My beloved Sprinkler maneuver. Let’s chat about this photo for a second.

1. Take notice of my face color. No, not reddish purple from embarrassment, but from INTENSITY. The Sprinkler is no joke, people.

2. I wonder, am I actually singing AND dancing at the same time? Or is it more of a guttural grunt, much like Serena Williams playing tennis?

3. My shirt buttons are literally holding on for dear life. Like I said, such is the Intensity of The Sprinkler.

4. The crotch of my pants is halfway down to my knees. This can only mean that the Van Halen jumps have loosened my pants considerably.

5. Will you marvel at my hand form? Mary Murphy would have nothing but praise for my lines.

All in all, I’m wondering about SYTYCD’s age limit for auditions because I am SO THERE NEXT YEAR.

Hat Thursday

July 24, 2008

Let’s be honest. Who cares about hair when you can wear HATS?

Yeah, that’s what I thought.

hair thursday makeover 44

July 24, 2008

First off, let me congratulate Mommy’s Martini for winning the Mooshwhoorly Hair Extravaganza. You, my dear, will be featured on next week’s Hair Thursday.

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Missy from Meanwhile, Back at the Ranch was another participant in the Moosh contest. I had the chance to meet the darling Australian during the last night at Blogher while I was trying to round up 17 people to accompany me to some random bar serving $4 margaritas. (PRIORITIES.)

While chatting with Missy, I informed her that she, in fact, did not win the Moosh contest, but was more than welcome to listen to me babble about her hair right then and there. (By the way, Missy was with Supertiff, who was a recent HT participant and good lord, her hair looked GORGEOUS. Tiffany, send me an update so everyone can see your glorious hair.)

At some point during the conversation, Missy mentioned she was spending the next part of her vacation in Los Angeles, and a dimly-lit bulb went off in my head. (It was late.)

“Come down to Orange County and I’ll give you a personalized Hair Thursday! I’ll get you in with my stylist!”

I think she thought I was kidding, but hoo boy, I was NOT kidding. Standing in that dark lobby, it was the best idea ever! Of course, I wasn’t really thinking of the logistics of this arrangement (such as What To Do With Wito In A Salon For Several Hours), but hey! It’s Hair Thursday! I’ll make it work.

I returned home from Blogher, contacted my stylist, Missy made her appointment time, and there you go.

I met Missy at Tek Salon yesterday with my toddler in tow for my first ever Hair Thursday: IN THE FLESH.

Without further ado, meet Missy.

Missy’s hair:

Naturally wavy/curly, but she straightens it 90% of the time
Mostly one length, with some grown-out fringe on the sides
Likes the length
Colored at home quite awhile ago, color is faded and uneven

Missy seemed a little nervous that I was going to suggest chopping her hair off, but rest assured, that was not the case as you can hear in this video. Can you sense the fear in her eyes during this clip?

Hair Thursday – Missy from Hair Thursday on Vimeo.

Oh my GOD, my voice is so annoying. Going to cry now.

I sent Missy off with the very talented Tera and let her work her magic.

First, a nice wash:

Since Missy’s color was a little faded and uneven, Tera added random chunks of dark chocolate brown that matched her natural color to break up unevenness. The result was fantastic because you could still see bits of the lighter reddish brown but it looked fresher and more interesting. She cut about 1.5 inches off her length (less than 4 centimeters, Missy!) and created many face framing layers with a sweeping bang.

Her layers are shorter in the back and work into longer layers in the front, which will give her long hair more texture and movement and will look amazing when she wears it curly. All of her layers were cut with a razor to give more texture, followed by texturizing scissors to take out more weight.