Blame Ramón


This song is sung to the melody of Tyrone by Erykah Badu.

If you have never heard of this song:

1) Watch the video and please familiarize yourself. Feel free to follow along.
2) We obviously have NOTHING in common.
3) I might need to re-evaluate our friendship.

I’m getting tired of his shit
My fingers are really hurtin’
See every time I pull him out
I gotta play lame ass chords on Ramón
See why can’t I play a damn D, sometimes
See I’ve been practicing all day
For a long time
I just want it to be
So easy
Like it needs to be, baby
But he must like to kick my ass
I think I’m gonna crap

I think ya better blame Ramón
(Blame him)

And tell him come on, help Whoorl learn her shit (come on, come on)

You need to blame Ramón
(Blame him)

And tell him I said come on

Now every time I have a chance to write a post
He comes beckoning with sweet promises of most
Oh, well hold up
Listen Ramón
I have shit to do
Cause Miss Whoorlie is always dealin’ with poo
And you know it’s true

Every time I try to play
I gotta turn the DVD on
To keep Wito engaged and not let him stray

While I practice the day away

Wito thinks Rachel is his mom
Because she’s da bomb
I must remain calm
Guitaraddiction dot com

I like you
But I must tell you the truth
Ramón wants to give

the internet da boot

So, you better blame Ramón
(Blame him)

And tell him come on, help Whoorl learn her shit (come on, come on)

You need to blame Ramón (OHEEEOHEEEOONNN)
(Blame him)

Hold on…but he sure is some fun


hair thursday makeover 19


Ramón Alejandro Django has traumatized my fingers and typing hurts mucho. No small talk, chiquitas.




Britt’s hair:

Usually has light brown hair with blond highlights, but went all blond this summer and hates it.
Very oily at the roots and dry at the ends
Medium-thick, with a bit of frizz
Just needs enough length to cover her “protruding ears”. Open for suggestions.
Spends about 30-40 minutes styling with a curling iron, blow dryer, and flat iron
Uses frizz serum, hairspray, root pump, leave-in conditioner, shampoo, conditioner

I love participants like Britt because I know no matter what hairstyle I recommend, she will be able to handle it. She’s obviously proficient with styling tools and such, so I don’t feel like I need to walk her through every single step. (Plus, she has very pretty hair!)


Britt, honey? What is that nest-like situation back there? Was it a result of back-combing/teasing for volume? Could you refrain from that from here on out? Mucho gracias.

(I’m not picking solely on you, Britt. I’m picking on EVERY WOMAN who teases their hair and neglects to look at the back before leaving the house. You know you are out there. By all means, tease away, just be sure to smooth it out!)

Let’s darken Britt’s hair a little bit for the winter- her previous light brown with blond highlights sounds perfect to me. Since I know she will rock whatever style she decides on, I’m going to let the readers do the talking (voting).

Long or short, whoorlistas?


Anyone else think Britt looks like Kellie Pickler? (Clearly, another fan of the hair tease.)

Miss Dawn:



Dawn’s hair:

Natural reddish brown color
Normal condition
Wavy and thick
Needs hair to be long enough to pull back (babyproof)
Doesn’t have any time to style, pulls it back into a ponytail
Has a difficult time with bangs due to a stubborn cowlick

Oh, this is a hard one. Not due to Dawn’s hair condition, but her lifestyle. I like to keep things realistic on Hair Thursdays, and here’s the deal. Dawn wants long hair. She can’t have bangs due to cowlick. She has a baby, which means she inevitably is going to pull it back.

What to do, what to do.

I looked and looked and looked for a photo last night, but everything was too styled, too many layers, just too much for Dawn.

I know what I want her to do. I want her to trim an inch off the bottom, cut a chin-length layer in the front for some definition, start parting her hair on one side (make the cowlick WORK for it, Dawn), and I want her to cut very subtle, very fine layers all over to get rid of the triangle effect she has going on.

Now, when Dawn sent me an email, she remarked that her hair looked like The Rachel every time she cut layers. These are not the type of layers I’m talking about- I want VERY subtle layers, the kind that you can barely see, but will change the overall shape of the hair.

Then, I saw the photo in a magazine last night:


This is similar to what I’m aiming for – fine layers all over (see the shorter pieces blowing in the model-esque wind?), so a little of the overall bulk is reduced.

I think this cut would look beautiful and it doesn’t require any extra effort. In fact, it should be one of those styles that will have people wondering if you did something different with your hair, but still similar to your previous length.

Since I’m letting Dawn off practically scot-free, I have one more request. How amazing would her hair look in this color? (FYI -notice the subtle layers in this haircut as well. If Dawn straightened her new style, it would look very similar to this.)


Tell her!




Ramón Alejandro Django. (Django is pronounced “Jango”. Also, RAD for short.)

He’s a total sadist and I can’t feel my fingers. I hate him.

The end.


Guitar Hero


Last week, I changed my New Year’s resolution. I originally wanted to start crocheting so I could make hats like this, but I just couldn’t get myself super excited at the prospect. (Maybe because I can BUY them with one lazy click of my mouse!) (Wait, I don’t have a mouse. Whatever, look at how cute Wito looks!)

I still wanted to do something with my hands, in order to help pull me away from my computer. (Internet BAD, Music GOOD!) So, I decided to learn to play the guitar.

Now, I’m not a total stranger to musical instruments, as I kicked SOME TRI-STATE ASS with my clarinet as a young lady.


Jealous much? 9 years old under the influence of something. (Most likely, Benny Goodman.)

I also started flute lessons in my late twenties, and let me tell you, there is nothing more humbling than showing up in your $500 J. Crew suit after selling a trillion dollars worth of pharmaceuticals that day, only to be sandwiched in between two eight-year-olds with braces. (Keep rocking the flute, Brittany and Jessica! Drugs BAD, Music GOOD!)

However, I have absolutely NO experience with string instruments. But I’m ready! Bring on the blistered fingers and utter frustration!

(I am hoping that having an extremely gifted guitarist as a father might give me an edge. GENES, DON’T FAIL ME NOW.)

To put it simply, I love music. My family loves music, and Wito LOVES music. In fact, he experienced his first jam with my father over the holidays.

Jam from whoorl on Vimeo.

The kid has an affinity for Hammond organs, no?

After much discussion and searching with my father (who will now be called GURU Stu Tu), my first guitar arrived today.


Isn’t he handsome?

So, I’m asking the internet a favor. Check in on my progress once in awhile. Keep me in line. Hold me accountable. And especially, expect a nothing short of a fabulous recital next December when I participate in Neil’s 3rd Annual Christmahanukwanzaakah Online Holiday Concert. I guess I better start practicing.

WAIT! What should I name him? (He was made in Spain, maybe something Spanish?) Oh help me, wise friends.