2007 December | whoorl

Monitoring The Situation

December 12, 2007

First off, are the “clever” entry titles really necessary?

Let’s see, I’m going to write about video monitors, so let’s name it, hmmm, MONITORING THE SITUATION! Yes, God, YES! I am fucking BRILLIANT. 2008 Blogger’s Choice Award, here I come.

16 months into this parenting gig, we JUST purchased a monitor for Wito.

You already know where this is going, don’t you? Oh, C’MON. Not every little thing written on this website has to do with my obsessive-compulsive issues.

Except. That it does. Peace be with you.

You see, we don’t need a monitor. We live in a 1950′s bungalow, people. Our bedrooms share a wall, which has a built-in floor furnace that heats both of the bedrooms. In other words, the only object dividing us from Wito is a contraption of heavy metal grating. We can hear everything. More specifically, I can hear everything. Rustling? Yes. Heavy breathing? Yes. Wito’s brain transitioning sleep cycles? I do believe so.

However, during the past two months, we have been wading in teething territory, or what I would like to call “Operation Holy Molars”.

Once again! Brilliant AND witty! Vote here! *pumping fists in air*

These son-of-a-bitch molars have caused some erratic night waking, but it’s difficult for us to assess the son-of-a-bitchdom because Wito’s crib sits right next the door. If we open that door, it’s all over. But what if the random moaning signals pain? What if his foot is stuck in the crib railing? What if some satanic looking Santa has crept into his room and is stab, stab, stabbing him?

The questions. My God, the questions.

Long story short. We bought a video monitor. And it rocks.

What’s Wito doing right now, you ask?

Why, he’s taking a nap! Thanks for asking.

What about now?

Oh, yes. Still sleeping.

5 minutes later?

Sawing logs, that kid.

1:55?

1:57?

1:59?

This can’t possibly bode well for me.

Fevers and Hair

December 6, 2007

Hey! Guess where I was yesterday afternoon? No, really! Take a guess!

Why, YES! I was at the pediatrician’s office! With Wito! Who had a fever of 102.7!

(insert hysterically maniacal laughter)

Ha. Ha. Er, ahem. How did THAT happen, you ask?

Let’s see:

Friday – Pediatrician’s office
Monday – Pediatric Neurologist’s office
Tuesday – Neuro Ophthalmologist’s office

Would you care to wager on how Wito came down with a fever? Could it possibly be the germy germs he’s been making out with for the past 5 days in said offices?

So, yes. We completed our 4th appointment in 6 days, as of late yesterday afternoon. Someone give this handsome toddler and his fair-haired mama a prize, will ya?

To top it off, I just can’t stop my tremendous feelings of guilt and worry.

No, not about Wito…about YOU PEOPLE!

I noticed this incoming link to my site, read it and tada, now feel like a Big Let Down Asshole. Did the lovely Alice make any sort of insinuation that I was a BLDA? Of course not! It’s my self-imposed guilt, people!

So, here’s the thing. I wasn’t planning on doing a Hair Thursday during the week of Christmas, two potential participants are MIA, so that leaves 4 lovely ladies who were supposed to be part of Hair Thursday 2007: The Frosh Year.

These four ladies got all of their information and photos in on time, so who am I to flake out on them? (Mom! Are you reading this? I can’t deal with guilt! I’ll do anything to make people happy! I AM EXACTLY LIKE YOU.)

So. Alice, Dani, Caroline R. and Stephanie B. – COME ON DOWN!

Okay, not this very minute, but I promise I will do a 4-participant Hair Thursday once I’m back in Oklahoma, where Wito will be lovingly whisked off by my family while I’m carelessly ignored by everyone. (Just kidding, mom! Don’t cry! Although, baking me a carrot cake might help with the guilt.)

December 27th*, yo. Be there or be square, bitches.

*updated due to ballyhoo

Worries

December 5, 2007

100, 99, 98, 97, 96, 95, 94, 93…what if something is horribly wrong with him?…focus on the counting, Sarah, you’ve got to get some sleep…92, 91, 90, 89, 88……what if I missed something? is it my fault?….87, 86, 85, 84, 83, 82…..he doesn’t deserve this…81, 80, 79, 78, 76…sleep, Sarah, sleep…

The last four nights have been filled with what seems to be one million what ifs and numbers. In the past, counting backwards has always helped to drown out my worries and lead sleep to me in the midst of my jumbled thoughts. And although my method still managed to succeed, the sheer volume of numbers recited in my mind was staggering.

My tiny snowball of worry started with an apprehensive visit last Friday to one of our pediatrician’s associates (ours was out of the country), which quickly morphed into an immediate referral and appointment with a pediatric neurologist on Monday. I’m sure I don’t even need to explain how terrifying it is to hear a pediatrician explaining the types of neurological events and disorders she wants to rule out…you know, the ones that make the back of your neck start to sweat and your hands tremble. And to top it all off, the fact that you must wait until 2 pm on Monday to find these things out. 76 hours, to be exact.

My weekend was abysmal.

The days were decent, but I couldn’t help but dissolve into tears every night while staring up at the dimly lit ceiling. Many people read this entry I wrote for ParentDish coupled with some nervous twitters, and put two and two together about what was happening. I can’t begin to tell you how wonderful it was to receive emails from friends and complete strangers telling me that we were in their thoughts. To all of you, I can’t thank you enough. Honestly.

Monday’s appointment finally arrived, and the neurologist was wonderful. Wito and Dr. M took to each other immediately. He filled us up with reassuring words, but thought it was important for us to see a sub-specialty in the neurological field in the near future. And by near future, I mean upon entering my home after the appointment, I answered my ringing phone and it was the sub-specialist’s office making an appointment for the next morning.

Yesterday morning, we buckled Wito into his car seat and drove to his third doctor’s appointment in five days. As we walked into the medical center, I looked down and this perfect little child, shuffling his feet and cooing to the trees, and felt horribly nervous for putting him through all of this. Of course, being the sweet toddler he is, he just looked at me, smiled and said “Bah!” (He is obsessed with saying bye right now.)

Three long hours later, we walked out with one of the most promising diagnoses we could have received. Wito should be just fine. Just fine.

This experience was definitely my foray into the serious worries of parenthood. However, we were one of the lucky ones. What about all of the parents who aren’t as lucky? The ones whose world is turned absolutely upside-down in the matter of a day? The ones dealing with life-threatening illnesses and life-altering diagnoses of their little ones?

To all of you who have dealt or are dealing with such situations, I just want to say that I am so sorry. It must be absolutely frightening what you are going through. It’s so hard to put into words, and I’m not trying to discount people without children’s feelings, but the love you feel for your child is different. It is different. It’s intensity can’t be described. Everything is in surround-sound; your happiness, fears, worries, joy, pride, guilt, everything.

Like I said, we were one of the lucky ones this time around. I won’t take that for granted.

With that said, I’m going to taking a break from Hair Thursdays until the new year. I’ll be leaving soon for an extended visit with my family (including my brand new nephew, Sam) and would like to focus a little more on my sweet boy over the holidays.

I’ll still be posting at ParentDish every day, and popping in here from time to time. (You just know an extended period with my family makes for excellent blog fodder.)

Once again, thank you for your thoughts and general awesomeness. Wito would also like me to tell y’all, “Bah!”

So, Bah!