Her Royal Highness of Pastry Land

12

Last night I dug into my decades-old Ziploc bag looking for more baby photos to use on my sidebar. I spent upwards of two hours browsing and scanning what seemed to be millions of old memories from around 25-30 years ago (yikes), and became surprisingly sentimental over the whole deal. Being a young kid in the 1970′s was the best!

Case in Point #1:

Simplicity. Look how happy, albeit hot and sweaty, I am in this picture. Just chillin’ with my Aunt Jemima bandana on a hot summer day while my dad waters the lawn. I wonder how long I spun around on that dorky sit-and-spin. Probably all freaking day long. Would kids these days be content on a plastic spinny-thing all day? I think not. Now, it’s all about the over-stimulating video games or driving a battery-operated mini-Hummer. Crazy, I tell ya. Bring back the sit-and-spin!

Case in Point #2:

McDonalds birthday parties. Oh, how joyous! Eating our cheeseburgers and fries while shooting the shit. Hell yes. Not concerned that some crystal meth freak might snatch us off the playground. And not once did our parents worry about us catching the Avian Flu while jumping around in the colored balls. Good times.

Case in Point #3:

In the 1970′s, you were forced to use your imagination. First of all, check out my thrilling tea party. I don’t remember who that little boy is, but he appears to be having a mighty fine time. Actually, he looks a little constipated and/or scared. Whatever. What a hostess- I particularly enjoy the way my arm is resting on the chair, like I am posing for Town and Country magazine.

Whoorl enjoys a lovely afternoon of tea and crumpets in her fine Oklahoma home.

Ok, that isn’t the reason I posted this photo. I truly believed with all of my heart that a miniature pastry queen lived in the top of my yellow ruffled curtains. Her specialty was blueberry pie, but she also made all sorts of fruit tarts and pastries. When I would have friends over, I would sit them down on the bed and tell them about my pastry queen. Then I would hand them an invisible pastry and promise that if they squeezed their eyes shut really tight, they could taste her amazing pies. Their faces would light up and they would yell out “I taste it! I taste it!” I would just nod, knowing that I was the luckiest girl to have a miniature pastry queen living in my curtains.

Call me bonkers, but I really could taste those pies. They were damn good.



COMMENTS (12)

Early-Onset Alzheimer’s

15

Don’t you hate misplacing an important object? And you look everywhere but it’s nowhere to be found? And then you totally FREAK THE HELL OUT BECAUSE YOU NEED IT NOW AND YOU CAN’T WAIT ANOTHER SINGLE SOLITARY MINUTE OR YOU WILL EXPLODE?

Ahem.

I just spent 15 minutes searching every room in my house for my glasses.

I had them on the entire time.

Oh.

My.

God.

Help.



COMMENTS (15)

Pinto Bean Syndrome Part Deux

10

The Pinto Bean Syndrome has taken me down once again. I really thought my sneezing fits this week were due to allergies until I woke up with the infamous scratchy throat this morning. DAMN. Could the PBS rear its ugly head at a more inopportune time? HELLO, THANKSGIVING. How can I put my turkey face on feeling like this?

Here’s my plan:

1. I only have to work for three hours today. When I get home, it’s lights out.
2. Take Emer’gen – C right now. Hey, it’s cranberry-flavored! Thanksgiving flavors for everyone!
3. Think positive thoughts. The weather has been unusually warm here, so technically, it could be allergies.
4. Pray to the Pinto Gods.
5. Cancel martini night with my fabulous boss. Ohhh, this one cuts deep.
6. Don’t spend hours trying to write an entry, even though I feel very guilty that I haven’t written anything remotely worthwhile in a week. I know you lovely people will understand. Maybe? Hopefully? Please?

In exchange for my lackluster post, I am leaving you with a clip my sister emailed me this morning. I might be pinto-delirious, but I had tears shooting out of my ducts from hysterical laughter. Check it out* and have a Great Thanksgiving!

*for my fellow Mac users, you need Windows Media Player for Mac to view the video



COMMENTS (10)

Apologies

6

Sorry about the lack of entries, peeps. My iBook is very feverish and needs to be hospitalized STAT.

Wish me luck at the Apple Genius Bar.

UPDATE – I’m so very glad I spent an extra $300 for an extended warranty that just so happens to NOT cover what is wrong with my computer. Looks like repairs will cost me EIGHT HUNDRED DOLLARS. I told the Genius Bar applehole that I might as well buy a new computer…he agreed. So, I will be back sooner than later armed with a new and improved laptop.

Good thing Christmas is on the way…



COMMENTS (6)