A List Before I Go

18

1. I have been a little under the weather for the past couple of days, but I can confidently say that the 22 Jamba Juice Coldbusters have done their job.

2. However, I woke up sounding like Kathleen Turner this morning.

3. Which is kind of cool because my fellow Blogher attendees might think I have a deep, sultry voice.

4. So, I am purposely shouting around the house. You know, to keep the pipes rusty. “WHAT’S THAT YOU SAY, WITO? YOU WANT A BA-BA? A BAAAAA-BAAAAAA?” *uncontrollable hacking* “OHHHHHHHHHH-KLAHOMA, WHERE THE WIND COMES SWEEPING DOWN THE PLAAAINNNNNNN!”

5. I am super excited about meeting all of the cool chicas.

6. However, I am scared that everyone will think I’m a self-mutilator or in a highly-charged domestic abuse situation due to all of the cuts and bruises on my legs and arms.

7. I am trying to remind myself that I will be around these people for several days, so they can witness my clumsiness firsthand. I have issues with running into tables, slamming my fingers in doors, tripping over air, etc. Hence the 49 bruises.

8. I have packed 5 pairs of shoes, and I’ve heard talk of that number being excessive. I think I’ve exercised great restraint.

9. I will miss my boys terribly.

10. But don’t hold it against me if I forget their names for a brief second. Alcohol + Jitters = Early-Onset Alzheimer’s Disease.



COMMENTS (18)

Comments

  1. Lyndsay says:

    I saw Kathleen Turner nude in The Graduate while studying in London. Don’t know why I felt the need to share that, but there you go. Have a great time at BlogHer.

  2. Cricket says:

    Yay for the sexy cold voice! Thats the best part of the cold. And I don’t think 5 shoes are excessive… that sounds like a good amount to me!

  3. Miguelina. (reluctant housewife) says:

    Oh! I wish I was going! Please take tons of pictures – I’m sure you’ll see tons of good hair days in the next couple of days.

  4. You are going to have so much fun! Please have a drink or ten for me! I can’t wait to hear all the stories from when you get back.

  5. Have fun and take lots of pictures.

  6. I too trip over air…it’s really quite amusing, no?

    Have a great time!

  7. i so wish i was going. we could run into door frames together. i’m a master at that!

    and only 5 pairs of shoes? please tell me you packed an excessive amount of hair product or lip gloss to make up for that. ;)

  8. have fun and have a martini or two for me, since I will sadly not be there. come back with lots of stories and pics please! :) (I am demanding, I know!)

  9. have a wonderful time, especially for those of us who can’t go!!

  10. Five??? Hahaha, you’ve never seen me pack! I can easily take ten for five days and want more. I think it was the opening scene from Dirty Dancing that corrupted me.

    Have a great time!

  11. I will be the one saying “Whoorl is really a man, Whoorl is really a man” when I hear your raspy voice.

    I kid.

    I totally planned on bringing a million shoes. But now have no room for them. It’s either the shoes or the underwear. I choose underwear.

  12. if you divide my three into your five, our average is 1.66? what? wait a minute, i don’t think my calculator is correct. okay, let’s just say, 4. a very respectable number for a four day trip.

    but then, we won’t be sharing shoes. also, don’t forget your houseshoes. even the W can have a raging case of toe funk.

    can’t wait for tomorrow!!!!!

  13. please have FUN! and say try to think of me once during a good drink. ;)

    stay sexy, froggy.

  14. Ooooh, have fun, it should be a blast!

  15. Enjoy your free “whoorl time”. I’m sure I don’t even need to tell you that. You do just fine on your own. I am so proud of my wee whoorl.

    Plus, it’s really great to truly MISS your boys every once in awhile. Makes them look even cuter when you return, if that’s possible. :D

  16. I twisted my ankle at work yesterday… by falling off my TWO inch heels. You’re in good company.

    Five pairs of shoes is excessive? I’d be worried that I didn’t have enough! You should rethink this. You need OPTIONS!

    No BlogHer for me, unfortunately… but I’m asking all of you to drink some mojitos for me. Thank you.

  17. Oh, five pairs is indeed great restraint! Sometimes I think I need a separate suitcase just for shoes.

    Have a good time!

  18. SO FUN to hang out with you this weekend. But so sad that I didn’t get to say good-bye. I miss you guys already.