Mindful Monday: Be Willing

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Last week, I got some disappointing news. The latest Lyme test results came back showing the worst numbers yet – this after plowing through the past few months on three simultaneous high-powered antibiotics. I can’t even begin to tell you how this news made me feel. Disappointed, angry, fearful, sad, but most of all, hopeless.

I’ve physically felt crummy this entire week. And why shouldn’t I? We’ve talked about this before – the way our thoughts shape our reality…how our fears and anger and resentment can physically make us feel worse. These are the times when we truly must be willing to look at the bigger picture – to realize that God has our back, and our job is to enjoy the moments we have right this very minute. To be willing to see all of the wonderful right in front of our eyes, even during struggle. That is the practice, you guys. To be willing. To accept the gifts and signs that the universe puts in front of us every minute of the day.

Yesterday, I spoke at a luncheon about the business of blogging and speaking your truth. The weekend leading up to it wasn’t super great – like I said, I was tired and defeated and in pain. I woke up yesterday morning and asked myself how I was going to get up in front of a roomful of women with grace and enthusiasm. I was in the midst of a giant pity party in my bed when D walked in with a package. It was in Saturday’s mail, and when I opened it, everything changed in the moment.

It was a necklace custom-made by Melissa de la Fuente that I had ordered a few weeks prior. A gold triangle with three dots representing the intersection of the mind, body, and spirit, and three arrows (representing my husband and kids) pointing upward to remind me to never give up and forge forward with joy, gratitude, and the willingness to see all the good being offered up to me. It couldn’t have arrived at a more perfect time.

I proudly wore the necklace yesterday during my talk, and I’d like to think I did it with the grace and enthusiasm I had hoped to convey to everyone in the room. Although I’m not sure “graceful” would be the adjective used to describe the photo I chose to use during my introduction.

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When speaking to a roomful of people, some might introduce themselves with a professional headshot. I, however, chose a selfie from the morning I woke up with bed head reminiscent of the flying nun. I woke up with that hairstyle, people. TALK ABOUT AN AWESOME MIRACLE.

It was a wonderful day spent with old and new friends, and I enjoyed every minute of it. So I ask you – would you be willing to see the good in today and tomorrow and the next? Because it’s right there waiting for you.



COMMENTS (22)

Comments

  1. My thoughts are with you! Blow past that bad news and make it a new day. :)
    Kristi recently posted…TGIF

  2. I’m sorry to hear that your results were not good, but your ability to change your attitude to a positive will get you through this! And I LOVE the necklace. Custom/handmade jewelry is my favorite:)
    Stacey recently posted…Eye on Etsy: Mother’s Day Gift Ideas

  3. What a gorgeous necklace, Sarah. I need something like that, a sort of talisman, something tangible that will remind me of those perfect important intersections. And also looks that beautiful. I’ve been struggling with seeing the good in today. Thanks for that reminder.
    Mona recently posted…Maybe one day I’ll be a normal person

  4. Love this post! Thanks for the encouragement, and the realness, and the hopefulness. It’s a constant battle everyday to let go of the negativity that sneaks in and instead take the joy that is available. Best to you!

  5. Phyllis says:

    Sarah! I’m a new reader; I found you while searching for lip gloss and kept reading because you are so fun, engaging and adorable! I am so sorry you are suffering and that you received not great news last week. I too deal with a chronic health issue and I have totally discovered the two “secrets” you also seemed to have found: attitude and faith. Those two things have made ALL the difference for me {and for my loved ones!} as I go through this trial. It doesn’t means it’s easy peasy and all kittens and rainbows; there are definitely times I succumb to a good old pity party. BUT with prayer and my faith, I’m like one of those old Bobo dolls ~ you can punch me but I WILL pop back up. : ) You have a WONDERFUL outlook and spirit!! And by being honest and transparent, you are reaching and encouraging so many others who are dealing with something. I just wanted to tell you that I am walking the challenging road beside you {we all are} and to encourage you to “keep the faith”. There is a Bible verse I love and rely on, and also a quote that really seems to fit you. I thought I would share both with you in the hope they encourage you! Verse: “I know what I’m doing. I have it all planned out — plans to take care of you, not abandon you, plans to give you the future you hope for.” {Jeremiah 29:11, The Message} And the quote: “Wherever you go, no matter what the weather, always bring your own sunshine.” {Anthony J. D’Angelo} That’s you! Take care and God bless, Sarah!

    • whoorl says:

      What a great comment, Phyllis. A Bobo doll! That’s the best comparison I’ve heard. Ha! Let’s start the Bobo doll club. ;)

      Thank you so much for your words, and I’m sending love and light your way!

  6. I’m so sorry to hear your test results came back not so great. I think you are so brave to be sharing your story with all of us and I thank you so much for doing that.
    My friend also suffered/suffers from Lyme disease and she went to an intensive treatment facility with alternative medicine in Florida. I can ask her the name of it if you would be interested. She is based in California, so it was difficult to be away from her family, but I think her overall treatment took about 4 weeks? I’ll confirm and let you know. She seems to be doing really really well now.

    Big virtual hugs to you! Tara
    Tara recently posted…Get Social: Customer Service Done Right Through Social Media

  7. Love you, Boo! (Love the necklace, too.)

  8. Nice selfies. As always. You totally win.

  9. Again, thank you for the vulnerability and willingness to share. Yesterday I heard these words (in my own head, but I think it was God): Be here. Right Now.
    This moment is where we belong. I find that if I focus on this very moment, I am able to recognize the gifts, blessings, opportunities, love, people, wonder, freedom, goodness (and on and on and on) with clarity.

    May you enjoy the moment. And I hope on your behalf that you find freedom from the physical ailments in the near future.
    natalie recently posted…Be Here. Right Now.

  10. Awww, I’m so sorry to hear that your results weren’t what you were hoping for and that you’ve been feeling crummy. I hope that writing these things down is also therapeutic for you. It’s inspiring for us reading! Also, I love the polka dotted shirt, and the flying nun hair style. My hair doesn’t look that quirky/put together when I wake up in the morning!
    Traci recently posted…It’s Your Choice

  11. I am so so sorry you had your worst numbers yet, Sarah. I was so inspired talking with you & plan on writing about your presentation on my blog! :) xo, Mary (The other auto-immunce chick at GLOLunch!)
    Mary recently posted…$285 Mother’s Day Tea Care Package from Sancti Spiritus Giveaway! #MothersDay

    • whoorl says:

      I loved talking to you too, Mary! It’s always so wonderful to talk to someone who gets it, ya know? Sending love your way!

  12. whoorl says:

    Once again, thanks for all of your kind words! I seriously need to print them out and read them when I’m feeling like crap.

  13. That just really sucks. But I am so inspired by your grace in your writing. The words on the screen sound strong and resilient…hard to explain from the reader’s perspective. But you sound like you’re going to beat this and that’s half the battle.

    Keep your chin up :)

    ps–I saw that necklace on instagram..it’s even more beautiful now that I know the deeper meaning.
    kristiina recently posted…Design Trend: Hexagons

  14. So sorry to hear about your numbers and pain. Keep going! You will find the right combination for you! I agree, so much of it is looking at what is right in front of you. Sending you healing thoughts!

  15. Sweet Sarah, though I am so sorry to hear that you had a set back, I am honored that my necklace is to be a small part of your healing process. I have nothing but positive & hopeful energy to add and have a feeling you are going to turn a corner soon. The fact that you used that photo for your talk, is so frickin awesome. If I had been there, I would have thought ” I adore this gal! She is aces” I love the deeper meaning you see in the necklace & that the arrows represent your loved ones. I am sending good thoughts, vibes and energy your way, hun. Thank you for this and wishing you the VERY best.
    xo
    Melissa

  16. Love you, love your necklace, loved your talk, love your attitude. You got this. Keep up the good work!
    xoxoxoxoxxoxo
    Jen recently posted…Facialworks 40 Minute Oxygen Facials [Giveaway!]

  17. It’s crushing to read your test results weren’t what you hoped for. Stay the course. I’m thinking of you. P.S. reading that you were in such pain last week prior to the GLO event makes my heart hurt. I know you were worried about committing in fear of not feeling well. I’ll tell you, I would have NEVER guessed you didn’t feel well. You were wonderful. Thank you so much for being (A BIG) part of the day.
    Wendy recently posted…What Does Your Mother’s Day Look Like?

  18. Hi Sarah,

    I’ve been reading your site for years, since your pregnancy with Wito. It’s funny how you can feel a kinship with a person from reading their blog, and it was clear to me from those early days that we were very similar people: Type A, list-making, control-loving good girls.* I just want to say that I am finding this new journey of yours incredibly inspiring. I’m a perfect stranger (and I don’t even have a blog to offer you a reciprocal window into my world!), but I am wishing you light and peace and healing and quiet in your busy mind and the hard-won but so comforting knowledge that everything will really be okay. Keep up your excellent work and thank you for being so brave and honest.

    *With really good hair.

    -Jenn, 31, across the country, terrible at savasana, great at organizing…everything

  19. Hi Sarah,

    My blogging friend told me you were dealing with Lyme – I was just diagnosed and have likely had it for a while. I’ve had vision problems, balance issues, headaches/migraines, had nausea, dizziness, memory issues, am ADD-ish, and have total brain fog. As in, I feel a little drunk all the time. I can’t think straight, and I lose words when I’m talking. I forget what I was about to do or say in mid-conversation all the time.

    I never had fever, aches, chills. Nothing typical of Lyme. Doctors have thought my brain fog was due to antidepressants, but maybe it’s been Lyme since last summer/fall!

    I am on Doxycycline now and just hoping and praying I am better by mid-week. My primary care doctor doesn’t seem to really believe that my atypical symptoms are Lyme, even though the initial blood work confirmed it. She’s still sending me to neurology specialists this week. I’ll have the confirmation blood work tomorrow. Luckily I live in the Boston area and some of the best Lyme docs are here, so I’m hoping to get an appointment.

    This is scary stuff, and I’m so sorry you’re dealing with it too. I hope you are feeling better.
    JD @ Honest Mom recently posted…When does free-range parenting become more like neglecting your kids?

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