An email that you should NEVER have to send to your guitar teacher

Subject: A few things

Hey (teacher’s name),

1. It has come to my attention (via my husband as I walked in the door from my lesson) that a certain button on my shirt was not fastened this evening. Let’s just say it was a very important button that should ALWAYS STAY FASTENED. Anyway, I’m a little mortified and want to apologize to you and possibly the nice student from Nebraska for accidentally flashing either of you. Of course, this had to be the one night I stuck around and blathered about football to both of you. (I vividly remember my hands on my hips, which after careful review in my mirror was not an appropriate stance, given the state of my button.) Awesome.

2. If for some reason I didn’t flash you or the Nebraska boy, you are more than welcome to forget that you read #1.

Okay then! Carry on.

Off to buy a new shirt,

  • Kristine

    October 13, 2008 at 7:42 am

    HaHa! I love it!

    You have to let us know if he answers you back.

  • tiddleywink

    October 13, 2008 at 7:48 am

    I am so very sorry that I am laughing to the point of tears. I really hope that I’m laughing WITH you.

    As a teen, I was in one of those damn team-building circles one evening, where we were all supposed to share our most embarrassing moment. I don’t recall which tale I told, because it was trumped by the later realization that my particular body position, sprawled out on my stomach and leaning up on my elbows while “sharing,” gave the people opposite me in the circle a perfect view down my shirt.


    You are definitely laughing WITH me, as D and I have not stopped laughing since last night. :)

  • andrea

    October 13, 2008 at 7:51 am

    After having Charlie I spent a day shopping downtown and realized for the better portion of my shopping trip half of my nursing tank was not properly fastened and of course I was wearing a very sheer shirt. One of my shining moments indeed.

  • Jenifer

    October 13, 2008 at 7:55 am

    Oh dear! Yeah, I’ve had that happen to me before. Mortifying.

  • Ariel

    October 13, 2008 at 7:59 am

    Fun! Nothing like a large dose of humiliation… :)

  • sizzle

    October 13, 2008 at 8:02 am

    Maybe the flashing was the highlight of their night, weekend, week, LIFE. You never know. ;-)

  • Kerri Anne

    October 13, 2008 at 8:15 am

    The response to this is going to be awesome. Will he a. deny he saw anything, even if he totally did or b. never stop giving you shit about how you can’t keep your shirt on in his presence? Tune in next week to find out! (And there I went making an unintentional pun. Wee! Also: I need more coffee.)

  • Angella

    October 13, 2008 at 8:17 am

    Will the shirt be making an appearance in The Working Closet?

    Why, yes. It already did on October 3rd. I even added a note to show the button malfunction.

  • Redneck Mommy

    October 13, 2008 at 8:18 am

    Laughing my butt off.

    What I would have paid to see the instructor’s face as he opened and read your email.


    Even if you didn’t flash him, you sure gave him a lovely mental visual. Wink.

  • Aimee Greeblemonkey

    October 13, 2008 at 8:36 am

    I was WONDERING what that tweet was about. HA HA HA.

  • Dynamita

    October 13, 2008 at 9:05 am

    Oh dear, that happened to me once during a job interview. Thankfully the interviewer was a woman and I managed to shrug it off when she noted it, but I still felt very embarrassed.

    Am suffering on your behalf.

  • Laura

    October 13, 2008 at 9:25 am

    I’ve had that very thing happen to me at work! How embarrassing!

    Oh, and yay Nebraska! :)

  • glamgranola

    October 13, 2008 at 9:30 am

    I am seeing a guitar lesson “on the house” in your near future. Oh My God!

  • wishcake

    October 13, 2008 at 9:47 am

    Heehee. Let’s just hope his wife doesn’t read his emails. She’d be all, “That tart! She’s trying to seduce my husband and pretending it was a wardrobe malfunction! Oh, hells no!”

    Reminds me of a time I went out to greet customers at work, and was all extra-bubbly and nice, and on my way back inside a coworker (a guy, mind you) said, “Uhhh. Your skirt? It’s unzipped.”


  • slynnro

    October 13, 2008 at 9:49 am

    Once in law school, I was wearing a button down whilst talking to a rather large group of fellow students about an upcoming group project. As I put on my backpack, 3 THREE! buttons busted open. THREE!

    So yeah, I’ve been there.

  • bearca

    October 13, 2008 at 9:59 am

    Oh sweet mercy NO. The mortification!

  • a madhouse wife

    October 13, 2008 at 10:03 am

    Oh, his wife’s gonna LOVE that. ;)

    Thank God he’s no longer married. That would have added an entirely new level of AWKWARD.

  • martymankins

    October 13, 2008 at 10:51 am

    I’m curious to see any replies. Happy new shirt shopping.

  • gorillabuns

    October 13, 2008 at 11:03 am

    Has he responded to your email yet?

    and wait! wasn’t he married like two months ago?

  • Rhi

    October 13, 2008 at 11:05 am

    I am STILL horrified about a similar incident when I was 17 years old and at dinner with my best friend’s family. Her VERY HOT older brother, Joe, (17 year old Rhiannon VERY MUCH wanted to make out with Joe) anyway, I felt a breeze and noticed that my dress was unbuttoned at a very important stop.

    Maybe he liked it, but considering I pretty much was still wearing a training bra at 17 (SAD!), I’m guessing he didn’t.

  • Bumbling

    October 13, 2008 at 11:07 am

    Seeing as how you noted in the above comments that he is no longer married, just think of it this way. “I. MADE. HIS. DAY!”
    A little charity goes a long way- you are assured speedy passage through the pearly gates someday.

  • amy

    October 13, 2008 at 12:16 pm

    AHHHHH!! De-ja vu…This TOTALLY happened to me during one of my job interviews. Which I actually GOT…and didn’t know said situation had occurred until I’d been there for over a year and the guys finally felt comfortable to share the details of that “risque” interview with me. Totally embarrassing. Maybe they didn’t notice ;)

  • Jerri Ann

    October 13, 2008 at 12:18 pm

    This is hysterical. I would have just preferred to not know.

  • Miss Virginia

    October 13, 2008 at 1:26 pm

    Hilarious! Reminds me of that Seinfeld where Elaine sends out a rather revealing holiday card!

  • Ninotchka

    October 13, 2008 at 2:55 pm

    Yeah, I’d love to hear his response. Too, too funny.

  • Backpacking Dad

    October 13, 2008 at 4:25 pm

    Dear guitar student:

    Based on your actions during our last class I have decided to implement a “no shirt, no pants, no strings attached” policy here in class (get it? that’s a pun there at the end; because it’s guitar class. Strings. Although, were this the actual policy I suppose that would mean our instruments would be unstrung, leaving us shirtless, pantless, and with nothing to occupy our time for an hour. Which, on second thought, is awesome. Please disregard tangent and return to the policy). Unless I hear from you in the next little while that your BLINDINGLY CLEAR MESSAGE TO ME about perhaps wishing to just strip down and strum (that is another pun; get it? because it’s guitar class and we strum, and also we might be naked?) was not your intended message but was instead perhaps just a wardrobe malfunc….

    Hang on. Letter from you.


    See you in class,

    [insert mortified guitar teacher’s name here]

  • Deidre

    October 13, 2008 at 4:37 pm

    Oh! The Embarrassment.

    I feel for you. Similar thing happened to me, when I worked in a liquor store, frequented by boys, and worked with only boys…

    Just be glad that no one started singing “but you can leave your hat on…”

  • Miguelina

    October 13, 2008 at 7:36 pm

    Oh, Whoorlita…I feel your pain.

  • dont call me maam

    October 13, 2008 at 9:32 pm

    And he didn’t start calling you Chesty LaRue? Squandered opportunity.

    Perhaps (and I can say this because I live in Nebraska), you will always be THAT memory for the Nebraska kid. He will forever be indebted to you. :-)

    Loved the guitar teacher’s response, too.

  • Paper Dolls for Boys

    October 15, 2008 at 8:32 am

    Laughing with you, WITH you!!!

    You have guts – 7 out of 10 budding (lol) guitarists would have just found a new teacher!!!

  • Gregg

    October 20, 2008 at 9:07 pm

    Um, I play guitar and could probably teach it if you ever move to St. Louis!