An Important Message From Wito

I noticed yesterday that my mother was braggity bragging about our house not being a “den of kiddie crap”.

You see, my mom likes to keep things tidy. She even wrote about it here. (Although DUDE, mom. I know I’m your muse and all, but could you NOT include me in those posts? Some of those ParentDish commenters are hella mental.)

However, on occasion, my mom’s silver laptop draws her in with the force of a black hole and I can do whatever I want.

Namely this:


So, um, I’m just saying she might want to change that statement or something. In fact, I have a new motto:

Wito: Keepin’ it real in ’08.

Peace to all of you on this Super Tuesday. DON’T FORGET TO VOTE OR MY MOM WILL HUNT YOU DOWN. (Armed with a Dustbuster.)

  • Kathryn

    February 5, 2008 at 9:26 am

    I’m loving that blue pillow.

  • kate

    February 5, 2008 at 8:31 am

    Well Wito, all I can say is THANK JEEBUS your mom is human afterall! :)

  • Swistle

    February 5, 2008 at 8:43 am

    *Whew* Because I was all foot-shuffly after seeing your (1) interior-decorated interior, and then hearing that (2) you didn’t have a den of kiddie crap.

  • Jen

    February 5, 2008 at 9:11 am

    Cute. Keeping it real, I like it!

  • Jen

    February 5, 2008 at 9:26 am

    hehe Wito and Maggie must be in cahoots: http://flickr.com/photos/jayesel/2243675682/

  • slynnro

    February 5, 2008 at 10:10 am

    I’m not a parent, but I am constantly reading about these crazy ParentDish commenters and their harsh judgments. Poor moms!

  • Marcie

    February 5, 2008 at 11:09 am

    I was going to comment over at Parent Dish but those people scare me!

    My husband and I try really hard to not have kid crap everywhere either. Before our daughter was born, we had cubbyholes built in to our living room specifically for kid toys. No one is allowed to give us a toy that won’t fit in the cubbyhole. Although now our kid is two and she loves baby doll strollers and tricycles, which are not standard size cubbyhole toys, damnit!

    For my own sanity I usually pick up most of her stuff while she’s napping. Then I don’t do it again until bedtime. She’s getting to the age where she can sort of help, although honestly, it’s really more frustrating to watch then helpful. (Can’t she see all those puzzle pieces she missed?!) But we’ve made it part of her bedtime routine, picking up all the toys before she takes a bath, in hopes that someday I can sit back and watch her mop the floors for me…

  • Natalie 42

    February 5, 2008 at 11:17 am

    For reals. I just read some of those. Can you say bitter? Yeesh. And I still love that chair. I think I’m becoming obsessed with it…

  • Catherine

    February 5, 2008 at 11:34 am

    My son (15 mos) ALWAYS wants my attention, so I tend to zone out with the tv or computer when he’s quiet. SUCH a bad idea. One time I did this and he found the Pop Tarts. He mushed them up, then got one pouch open. When I found him, there were crumbs EVERYWHERE and chocolate all over his face. It was absolutely hilarious, but I’m usually better about checking up on him now.

    My dad used to give me a hard time about my living room always being messy (Lucas’s toy box is down here), and I tried to tell him that I can clean all day and it’s still a wreck. He finally got fed up and decided to clean up himself, and Lucas was pulling toys out faster than my dad could pick them up. I was like, “In your FACE!!!” Haha. I usually just pick up toys once a day, before I vacuum, and try not to worry about it the rest of the time.

  • Gretchen

    February 5, 2008 at 11:54 am

    It’s so true what they say:

    Cleaning up while your kids are awake is like shoveling the walk while it’s still snowing.

  • gorillabuns

    February 5, 2008 at 12:00 pm

    I’m all for keeping it real. Less stress on everyone involved. Unless someone comes over to visit – trash bags come out to play.

  • andrea

    February 5, 2008 at 12:17 pm

    Little bit a neat-nick here as well–is it possible to wear out a vacuum from overuse after just a year? I reluctantly gave up my guest room so it could become the den of disaster–but even now it gets a thorough cleaning twice a day, I just can’t stand clutter.

    I have a hard time reading/commenting on parentdish; those folks are batshit crazy.

    Our tuesday is two weeks away, but my ballot is all filled out and ready to be dropped off. Rock the vote (I just aged myself with that one).

  • whoorl

    February 5, 2008 at 12:24 pm

    “Bitter with absolutely no sense of humor? Comment here.” should be ParentDish’s tagline.

  • Angella

    February 5, 2008 at 12:42 pm

    If I posted a photo of my great room right now, you would tear up. It is good to see that your house is *sometimes* a *tiny bit* messy.

    Sorry about the lame commenters. Too bad you could not hire people to leave flaming bags of poop on their doorsteps.


    AWESOME. But don’t worry about me, we have our own fun behind the scenes regarding the commenters. It just about makes up for their generalized shittiness.

  • Sharri

    February 5, 2008 at 1:06 pm

    Oh thank you, Wito, for making me feel normal. I am glad your house is a den of plastic crap (or mostly wood as it seemed) at least SOME of time.

    Lame commenters? We no like dem.

  • cristen

    February 5, 2008 at 1:39 pm

    oh, but those lame commentors on the dish are so very entertaining!

  • ikate

    February 5, 2008 at 4:55 pm

    There is a huge difference between that photo and the dens of most homes with kids that are full of HUGE plastic toys. Those toys look to be mostly wooden and have some aesthetic to them. So many people have not one, or maybe even two, that can be tucked into the corner but DOZENS. Friends of ours have their entire walk-up/finished attic dedicated to toys. I’m not kidding you to say if it’s as big as the child, plastic and a “toy of the year” at any point in the last 5 years they have it. Bonus is that Maggie can play with all the crap there (and at daycare) so we don’t have to bring it home.

    We have a nice cedar toy chest in our den and if it doesn’t fit in there it doesn’t belong in our house. She has a couple of larger toys in her room, but there is no reason that baby=plastic decor.

    As for cleaning, I’m lazy and let it go until after bedtime. She’s 16 months old and her attention span lasts for putting away 2 toys and that’s fine with me. But I’m also not home with her all day, so I think the trail of toys would get to be if I was.

    Final note: those parent dish commenters are MEAN! I’ve been reading there for about 18 months and all of a sudden they are nasty all the time. You and Linda Lee are two of my fav bloggers and it kills me to read the comments those women leave the both of you. Ugh!

    ..off rant… (sorry)

    Aww thanks, ikate! If it makes you feel any better, those asshat commenters provide my husband and I hours of enjoyment. Seriously, they are CAH-RAZY.

  • Karen

    February 5, 2008 at 4:59 pm

    I lovingly refer to my laptop as Silver Baby. My 22 month old is very jealous when Mommy spends too much time with Silver Baby.

  • chris

    February 5, 2008 at 5:47 pm

    I am always following behind my kids either cleaning up after them or yelling at them to pick up their stuff. I just can’t abide clutter. It makes me hella mental.

  • Kim

    February 5, 2008 at 9:17 pm

    Okay. Wait. You show that you’re human and live in a house with kid toys that sometimes get all over the place but… but… BUT then you show pictures of your house and well, how the hell do you keep the kid out of all the non-kid stuff? You have a beautiful home, how in the world do you keep it that way? Have you already trained Wito to not touch what isn’t his? I’m so very jealous. Everything has been put out of reach or blocked off in our world and it’s kinda driving me crazy. :) Your clean, well put-together, well-displayed, “adult” home makes me green with envy!

  • Erin

    February 6, 2008 at 10:59 am

    My home isn’t a den of toddler crap either – at least while the toddler is sleeping! I tend to try to clean up during nap time and after dinner so that the grownups in the house can enjoy their grownup living room. But quite honestly, during waking hours, my living room looks more like a victim of Wito’s handy-work.

    And wow. I thought I was the only one scared away from commenting on ParentDish. Yikes. I read daily but have never commented because, well, yikes!

  • Lisa

    February 6, 2008 at 1:24 pm

    Ha–I love when I can recognize the same toys like the xylophone as well as the Leap Frog Table (I can hear the different melodies that it plays right now). It’s crazy how quickly everything gets dumped out and strewn from room to room. Funny that you should mention the Parent Dish commenters–they are seriously crazy. I do comment on your blog there, and I am constantly shocked how whacked out some of the people are (even the whole eskimo debacle-geeez)–but, you’re awesome!

  • OMSH

    February 7, 2008 at 7:26 am

    It really is like some kind of gravitational pool. Even on the eyes. You even lose peripheral! OH MY STINKIN’ HECK…what is UP with that? And then, you look around and you see three kids on the couch with brownies.


    All I had to do was stare and they all moved to the table.
    But really…BROWNIES.

    Wito – keepin’ it real is good – really good, BUT give momma a break. Really, this hair stuff is hard work. I know, I can’t do it.

  • Aimee Greeblemonkey

    February 7, 2008 at 8:59 pm

    Declan hates when I get near my Mac, it has a tractor beam or something.